¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

11/22 homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: À±*Çö
2022-12-22 1455

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Driving own car is very convenient because people could go anywhere anytime.
Especially, driving is so useful on the season when the weather is too hot or cold to walk outside.
However, people should keep some points to drive safely.
Using mobile phone during driving is too dangerous.
So I try not to use mobile phone as far as possible.
If I have to call someone, I used to connect bluetooth to get my both hands free.
Also, I keep the speed limit.
It's important to concentrate on driving, so I listen to music or radio with low volume.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there. Dr. Stella!

Driving is a very important skill. As a doctor, you need to be mobile and ready anytime your patient needs help. Anyway, driving safely is the top priority on the road. It is a matter of life and death. So, focus on the drive and keep your eyes on the road at all times.

Below are my grammar suggestions to some of your sentences. Of courese you got so many sentences correctly and I am so glad about them! Once again, the use of 'the' is one common suggestion. Please go over thme below.

Thank you very much for your time and effort in writing this composition!

-T. Donna~

Driving own car is very convenient because people could go anywhere anytime.
>> Driving one's  own car is very convenient because people could go anywhere anytime.

Especially, driving is so useful on the season when the weather is too hot or cold to walk outside.
>> Correct!
Or: Driving is so useful on the season especially when the weather is too hot or cold to walk outside.

However, people should keep some points to drive safely.
>> Correct!

Using mobile phone during driving is too dangerous.
>> Correct!

So I try not to use mobile phone as far as possible.
>> So I try not to use the mobile phone as much as possible.

If I have to call someone, I used to connect bluetooth to get my both hands free.
>>  If I have to call someone, I used to connect the bluetooth to get both of my hands free.

Also, I keep the speed limit.
>> Correct!

It's important to concentrate on driving, so I listen to music or radio with low volume.
>> Correct!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
125101 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-01-26 1734
125100 I think the most overrated holiday is¡¦ ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-01-26 782
125099 What do you think is the best movie from your country? Why? ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-26 1093
125098 Do you think there should be a world holiday for everyone on... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-26 831
125097 Homework from the Feedback (3) ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-26 769
125096 What is the best way to deal with feelings of anger? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-26 792
125095 What do you worry about getting older? ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-26 865
125094 What do you think when you look at yourself in the mirror? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-01-26 747
125093 What is your favorite Seollal Holiday memory? ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-26 841
125092 Homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-01-26 2
125091 I want to spend the old stage with family ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-01-26 1
125090 Do you think that teachers should use corporal punishment as a... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-26 4214
125089 homework ÀÌ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-01-26 2292
125088 Homework Àå*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-26 2
125087 homework ½Å*ÈÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-26 1015
125086 It`s quiet ±è*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2023-01-26 1
125085 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-26 1
125084 The creating ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-26 1
125083 1. What is the USA most famous for? 2. What do you think about... ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-26 2
125082 25.Jan.2023 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-26 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04