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담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

Homework

작성자: 김*우
2022-12-25 1185

회원님의 영작문

Merry Christmas!
Do you enjoy Christmas?
We realized that we didn't build our Christmas tree yesterday.
Thus, my family and I found the tree(actually it's not a real tree, just decorated stuff), and then built it in our living room.
Yesterday, there were some bad news.
My friend who has a cancer asked if our meeting could be delayed, because she had a bad condition, and I couldn't help but accept that.
In addition, my last daughter got a flu with a high fever.
One more thing is that my wife hurt her head and body because she fell down on the iced road.
However, this is Merry Christmas.
Excepting patients, Irene and Rachel and I went to the church.
We attended the worship, and my kids received many presents.
After the worship, we got a special cake that was booked before, and then we went to a butcher's shop to buy some meats for our special meal.
In the shop, we bought some beef and pork, and the clerk gave me a highball can with a lemon for a present.
Now I am waiting for the food.
CU

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Merry Christmas, Dr. Kim!

In spite of all th adversities of your Maegan and your wife being under the weather and meeting some accident, definitely, it shouldn't stop you from celebrating a very merry Christmas. Perhaps Maegan got excited or infected during the last activity in church last week. Perhaps she is feeling better now. I hope that your wife is doing alright and will be extra cautious of her steps as she goes by th icey lanes. 

I wonder how your Christmas tree looks like? Every year, me and my son decorate our home together. It is our bonding activity we enjoya lot. I am sure that you had a great time decorating your tree as well. Moreover, receiving presents during this season is so exciting especially for the kids. Well, we also feel like we are kids as we receive gifts, don't we? After all, being with the family is the meaning of Christmas- as Jesus was born, He was with his family in a very simple stable, no bed. Hence, praying and being together with the family is the essense of Christmas.

Well, my Christmas was a blast. I went to the radio to greet all of our listeners and viewers on Facebook. Right after, we had our lunch and gift giving in our parent's house. It was a lovely time.

Anyway, below, there are some remarkable sentences you have made. Study them carefully. Overall, it was a very good piece of writing. Thank you for your time and diligence.

See you tomorrow.

-T. Donna~

Merry Christmas!
>> Correct!

Do you enjoy Christmas?
>> Correct!
Or: Are you enjoying your Christmas?

We realized that we didn't build our Christmas tree yesterday.
>> Correct!

Thus, my family and I found the tree(actually it's not a real tree, just decorated stuff), and then built it in our living room.
>> Thus, my family and I found a tree (actually it's not a real tree, just decorated stuff), and then built it in our living room.

Yesterday, there were some bad news.
>> Correct!

My friend who has a cancer asked if our meeting could be delayed, because she had a bad condition, and I couldn't help but accept that.
>> Correct! Very good sentence!

In addition, my last daughter got a flu with a high fever.
>> Correct!

One more thing is that my wife hurt her head and body because she fell down on the iced road.
>> Correct!
Or: One more thing is that my wife hurt her head and body because she fell down on the icey road.

However, this is Merry Christmas.
>> However, this is a Merry Christmas.

Excepting patients, Irene and Rachel and I went to the church.
>> Except the patients, Irene, Rachel, and I went to church.

We attended the worship, and my kids received many presents.
>> Correct!
Or: (Delete the comma.)

After the worship, we got a special cake that was booked before, and then we went to a butcher's shop to buy some meats for our special meal.
>> After the worship, we got a special cake that was booked before, and then, we went to a butcher's shop to buy some meat for our special meal.

In the shop, we bought some beef and pork, and the clerk gave me a highball can with a lemon for a present.
>> Correct!

Now I am waiting for the food.
>> Correct!

CU
>> See you.
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첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
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04