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What was the most memorable vacation you ever had? Why?

작성자: 김*문
2022-12-26 1216

회원님의 영작문

I think this vacation will be the most memorable vacation I've ever had. Before I go to America as an exchange student, I want to send much time with my family. But, I have to stay in Seoul because of the vacation class. I must take classes even during vacation to graduate the university. I am missing my family and that makes me call to my family everyday. Also, I couldn't meet my friends well during last semester. I took one semester off so I just stayed at my hometown. Furthermore, my friends in hometown were not in there due to the university and I only stayed at home because of my puppy. I really loved time with my puppy, Maru. Therefore, I will try to spend time with my friends having lunch or dinner. My calendar is full of schedules even now. Preparing to go to abroad, I am really worried that I can adapt to new life and become independent. However, I want to believe myself that I can do and I will do best to spend time with my people before I leave.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hello, Mary! Thank you for finishing your homework. I also believe that you can finish your exchange student period in America terrifically! Take care!-Faith-
I think this vacation will be the most memorable vacation I've ever had. 
>> I think this vacation will be the most memorable vacation I will ever had. 
Before I go to America as an exchange student, I want to send much time with my family. 
>> Before I go to America as an exchange student, I want to spend much time with my family. 
But, I have to stay in Seoul because of the vacation class. 
>> However, I have to stay in Seoul because of the vacation class. 
I must take classes even during vacation to graduate the university. 
>> I must take classes even during vacation to graduate from the university. 
I am missing my family and that makes me call to my family everyday. 
>> I am missing my family and that makes me call them every day. 
Also, I couldn't meet my friends well during last semester. 
>> Also, I could not meet my friends well last semester. 
I took one semester off so I just stayed at my hometown. 
>> I took one semester off, so I just stayed in my hometown. 
Furthermore, my friends in hometown were not in there due to the university and I only stayed at home because of my puppy. 
>> Furthermore, my friends in my hometown were not there due to their studies in university, and I only stayed at home because of my puppy. 
I really loved time with my puppy, Maru. 
>> I really love my time with my puppy, Maru. 
Therefore, I will try to spend time with my friends having lunch or dinner. 
>> CORRECT
OR Therefore, I will try to spend time with my friends at lunchtime or dinnertime. 
My calendar is full of schedules even now. 
>> My calendar has full schedule even now. 
OR I have a tight schedule these days.
Preparing to go to abroad, I am really worried that I can adapt to new life and become independent. 
>> As I am preparing to go abroad, I am really worried if I can easily adapt to my new life and become independent. 
However, I want to believe myself that I can do and I will do best to spend time with my people before I leave.
>> However, I want to believe in myself that I can do it and I will do my best to spend time with my loved ones before I leave.
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