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영작교정 게시판

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담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

Romio and Juliet + Greek story

작성자: 김*율
2022-12-27 1409

회원님의 영작문

There was a lady named Juliet, and a gentelman named Romio. Those two were in great love but thier parents never let them even meet. They talked seceretly with each other in a small hole in the soundproof thick wall. After they had seceretly talked the plan out, they escaped. No matter how much cops and mans and especially their parents (running really far away from each other STILL) chased they ram across the wild woods. Screaming in glee of freedom, they went to aplace where nobody had ever gone to. Then Romio went away for some long hours to find some nice and cozy absent hut. They promised to meet in the white cherry bush if Romio did'nt return in 1 hour. But when Romio didn't return that fast, Juliet became worried. She took off in the wrong derection and still somehow got to the cherry bush. Then a strong lion spit blood on her shawl! She hid behind the cherry bush leaving the shawl behind. then before the lion went away, Romio saw the shawl... to be continued in Skype chatbox...

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hello Heather, good day. I am amazed by the story you made. You were able to use new words. Continue to broaden your vocabulary through writing and speaking. We will talk about the story in class. I will see you. ~ T. Lyn
There was a lady named Juliet, and a gentelman named Romio. 
>>There was a lady named Juliet and a gentleman named Romio.
Those two were in great love but thier parents never let them even meet. 
>>The two were very much in love, but their parents forbade them to even meet.
They talked seceretly with each other in a small hole in the soundproof thick wall. 
>>In a small hole in the thick soundproof wall, the two talked privately.
After they had seceretly talked the plan out, they escaped. 
>>After secretly talking about their plan, they escaped.
No matter how much cops and mans and especially their parents (running really far away from each other STILL) chased they ram across the wild woods.
>>No matter how man cops and men, especially heir parents (who are still really far from each other) chase them across the wild forest.
Screaming in glee of freedom, they went to aplace where nobody had ever gone to.
>>Screaming with the joy of freedom, they went where no one had gone before.
Then Romio went away for some long hours to find some nice and cozy absent hut. 
>>Then Romio left for a ling time to find a nice and cozy empty cabin.
They promised to meet in the white cherry bush if Romio did'nt return in 1 hour. 
>>They promised to meet in the white cherry bush if Romio did not return in an hour.
But when Romio didn't return that fast, Juliet became worried. 
>>But Romio didn't come back that soon, Juliet became concerned.
She took off in the wrong derection and still somehow got to the cherry bush.
>>She took off in the wrong direction and still somehow got to the cherry bush.
Then a strong lion spit blood on her shawl! 
>>Then the mighty lion spat blood on her shawl!
She hid behind the cherry bush leaving the shawl behind. 
>>She left her shawl behind and hid behind a cherry bush.
then before the lion went away, Romio saw the shawl and thought the lion ate her! 
>>Before the lion left, Romio saw the shawl and thought the lion had eaten her!
He cried in mistaken dismay and brown breaded himself. 
>>He wept with false disappointment and ate brown bread.
Juliet saw Romio doing that terrible thing and with his knife, she did the same, crying. 
>>Juliet saw Romio do that terrible thing and did the same while weeping with his knife.
Their flood went into the roots of the white cherry tree and made the cheerys turn red. 
>>Their blood got into the roots of the white cherry trees and turned the cherries red.
The cherries unsungly sybolize the love of tragity.
>>Cherry symbolizes tragic love.
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