¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Is Christmas too commercial nowadays? How should a very traditional Christmas be spent?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*°æ
2022-12-27 1355

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

The Christmas season is sure to be a good chance for lagging commerce to bound up again. However, We shouldn¡¯t forget the original meaning of Christmas. I don¡¯t blame how commercial Christmas comes to be nowadays. But I want to say what is inside that counts. In short, we need to celebrate Christmas, reminding us of the true happiness of Christmas, that is, we can be drawn closer to God thanks to Jesus¡¯s sacrifice. Anyway, Christmas day is a blessed day. So Let us not only enjoy it ourselves but also share the happiness of the day with as many people as possible so that Christmas can be full of joy and happiness.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Steve! ^^
Thank you for the composition.
See you in our next class! :)

~ Teacher Tricia


The Christmas season is sure to be a good chance for lagging commerce to bound up again. 
>>> CORRECT!

However, We shouldn¡¯t forget the original meaning of Christmas. 
>>> CORRECT!

I don¡¯t blame how commercial Christmas comes to be nowadays. 
>>> CORRECT!

But I want to say what is inside that counts.
>>> CORRECT!

In short, we need to celebrate Christmas, reminding us of the true happiness of Christmas, that is, we can be drawn closer to God thanks to Jesus¡¯s sacrifice. 
>>> CORRECT!

Anyway, Christmas day is a blessed day. 
>>> CORRECT!

So Let us not only enjoy it ourselves but also share the happiness of the day with as many people as possible so that Christmas can be full of joy and happiness.
>>> CORRECT!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
124304 Tuesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-20 1189
124303 Do you like meeting new people? ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-12-20 1526
124302 blind date ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-20 5
124301 Is the bassist handsome? ^^ Share your answer in a few sentences. ¼Û*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-12-20 1
124300 What is the most important thing in your life today? Answer in a... ¼Û*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-12-20 1
124299 sorry ±è*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2022-12-20 3
124298 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-20 1
124297 Where is the most amazing place you have been? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-20 2571
124296 Movie ÀÌ*Çý ¿Ï·á 2022-12-20 5
124295 Describe my future self! ÀÓ*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-12-20 1132
124294 animals ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-20 968
124293 Homework 12/20 °í*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-12-20 14
124292 19.Dec.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-20 1
124291 What are you studying these days? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-20 0
124290 I think so ¹Ú*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-20 1242
124289 Homework ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-20 1
124288 Can you tell me about something you regret? Àü*ä ¿Ï·á 2022-12-19 2322
124287 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-19 1270
124286 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-12-19 1072
124285 Homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-12-19 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04