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Do you agree that children should be protected at home, in school, and in public areas? Why or why n

작성자: 황*하
2022-12-30 1613

회원님의 영작문

Children are weak physically and mentally so they ,of course, must be protected by adults. It takes a lot of time to train and educate children to construct right behavior. There is a saying that all villeage have to put their whole efforts to bring up one baby. It means that it is really hard to achieve it. Children are really vulnerable in every situation and places. They don't exactly know which action they take if there is an event which they haven't experienced before. Parents must be the first teacher to construct children's behavior therefore, children can learn basic ethics in the society. To achieve these goals, teacher's authority has decreased a lot. It became a serious problem already. Students intentionally make teachers angly and record the situation with their smartphone to sue them or threathen them. Many teacher have raised the issues to build a correct educational environment but there are few teachers who do abuse their power and take action in a bad way.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Good day, Sir Hwang!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille

Children are weak physically and mentally so they ,of course, must be protected by adults. 
>> CORRECT! 
It takes a lot of time to train and educate children to construct right behavior. 
>> CORRECT! 
There is a saying that all villeage have to put their whole efforts to bring up one baby. 
>> There is a saying that all people in the village have to put their whole efforts to bring up one baby. 
It means that it is really hard to achieve it. 
>> CORRECT! 
Children are really vulnerable in every situation and places. 
>> CORRECT! 
They don't exactly know which action they take if there is an event which they haven't experienced before.
>> CORRECT! 
Parents must be the first teacher to construct children's behavior therefore, children can learn basic ethics in the society. 
>> CORRECT! 
To achieve these goals, teacher's authority has decreased a lot. 
>> CORRECT! 
It became a serious problem already. 
>> CORRECT! 
Students intentionally make teachers angly and record the situation with their smartphone to sue them or threathen them. 
>> Students intentionally make teachers angry and record the situation with their smartphone to sue them or threaten them.
Many teacher have raised the issues to build a correct educational environment but there are few teachers who do abuse their power and take action in a bad way.
>> CORRECT! 

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