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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

Homework

작성자: 김*우
2023-01-04 1480

회원님의 영작문

Hello.
How was your day?
Lately, there has been only few patients in the clinic.
Maybe I guess that many people are trying to save money.
I hope our situation will be better.
I have a good news.
Dr. MJ found a parking place near our new building.
Because I plan to meet a building company staff tomorrow, I will visit the parking lots and ask if we could use it.
I really hope that it's possible to use that parking lots.
Meanwhile, I met the last moving company boss.
He requested too much money.
That's why we decided to contract the company that we met yesterday.
After our work, Dr. Bae who will work for the current clinic came to the clinic.
We discussed about many things; Education of staff, Interview of new staff for him, Elongation of some contracts including security, and mutual movement.
As we talked to each other, I realized Dr. Bae really like to travel.
As I looked at him, I thought "Success"means doing everything when I want it.
It needs a time, money, and relationships.
See you

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Good morning, Dr. Kim!

Yesterday, my son went back to school so, I felt a little tired doing all the motherly things like cooking, cleaning, and preparing for all of his things but I am used to them. So, it is back to 'normal', I must say. 

I guess you are right. People want to save their money now so, when it is time to almost necessary to go out because of spring time, clients and patients will start to flock in your clinic and be beautiful. I guess, they know that you will also be transferring so, maybe, you will be visited in your new clinic soon. It's a great news that you have found parking. I think that is very crucial in keeping your patients since they will always consider comfort after surgery or consultation.

Meanwhile, I am not sure what you mostly talked about Dr. Bae, however, he has some definition of 'success' or maybe, you have concluded that success, as evident in the case of Dr. Bae is the freedom to choose the things that makes one happy such as vacation, time for one's self, and quality relationships. I totally agree with thim and with you then.

Therefore, I have deleted some unnecessary words for the grammar suggestions. Also, underscored are my other suggestions to complete or replace other words that will make the sentences even more correct. Study them carefully. Thank you so much for your hard work always!

See you again soon.

-T. Donna~

Hello.
>> Correct!

How was your day?
>> Correct!

Lately, there has been only few patients in the clinic.
>> Correct!

Maybe I guess that many people are trying to save money.
>> Maybe, I guess, many people are trying to save money.

I hope our situation will be better.
>> Correct!

I have a good news.
>> Correct!

Dr. MJ found a parking place near our new building.
>> Correct!

Because I plan to meet a building company staff tomorrow, I will visit the parking lots and ask if we could use it.
>> Correct!

I really hope that it's possible to use that parking lots.
>> I really hope that it's possible to use those parking lots.

Meanwhile, I met the last moving company boss.
>> Correct!

He requested too much money.
>> Correct!

That's why we decided to contract the company that we met yesterday.
>> That's why we decided to sign a contract with the company that we met yesterday.

After our work, Dr. Bae who will work for the current clinic came to the clinic.
>> Correct!

We discussed about many things; Education of staff, Interview of new staff for him, Elongation of some contracts including security, and mutual movement.
>> Correct!
Or: We discussed about many things; education of staff, interview of new staff for him, elongation of some contracts including security, and mutual movement.

As we talked to each other, I realized Dr. Bae really like to travel.
>> As we talked to each other, I realized Dr. Bae really likes to travel.

As I looked at him, I thought "Success"means doing everything when I want it.
>> Correct!
Or: As I looked at him, I thought "success"means doing everything when I want it.

It needs a time, money, and relationships.
>> It needs time, money, and relationships.

See you
>> See you.
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01
교정 내용은 최대 1,000byte까지 올릴 수 있습니다.

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02
전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
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이용이 어려운 점 양해 부탁 드립니다.
04