¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What is your feeling about mandatory military service in your country? Do you think that your countr

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*ÇÏ
2023-01-27 1276

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

All people say with one voice that we'd better not to go to the army if it is possible. All men who have don't have health problem must serve as a soldier in Korea. It is one of the major obligations people should follow. I went to the army when I was 20 years old as a military police. I had a lot of hard time due to the crazy culture that juniors had to run all the time, respect to seniors with weird way and do all the stuffs. It considered as a normal practice that seniors beat and threaten juniors. Although, soldier spent hard time to get millitary trainning, they couldn't take a rest very well because they needed to stay in same building there, they were not allowed to go home after work. It is a main problem of the military service. However, there is advantage from the military. Most people look back upon their past and then they decided to change their lifestyle in a good way. So many people believe that military service provide the incredible experience that might help peol

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Sir Hwang!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille

All people say with one voice that we'd better not to go to the army if it is possible. 
>> CORRECT! 
All men who have don't have health problem must serve as a soldier in Korea. 
>> All men who don't have health problems must serve as a soldier in Korea. 
OR >>  All men who don't have medical concerns must serve as a soldier in Korea.
It is one of the major obligations people should follow. 
>> CORRECT! 
I went to the army when I was 20 years old as a military police. 
>> CORRECT! 
OR >> I went to the army when I was 20 years old as a soldier. 
I had a lot of hard time due to the crazy culture that juniors had to run all the time, respect to seniors with weird way and do all the stuffs. 
>> I had a lot of hard time due to the crazy culture that juniors had to run all the time, respect seniors ina weird way, and do all the stuffs. 
It considered as a normal practice that seniors beat and threaten juniors. 
>> CORRECT! 
Although, soldier spent hard time to get millitary trainning, they couldn't take a rest very well because they needed to stay in same building there, they were not allowed to go home after work. 
>> Although soldiers spent hard time to go to the military training, they couldn't take a rest very well because they needed to stay in same building, they were not allowed to go home after work. 
It is a main problem of the military service. 
>> It is the main problem of the military service. 
However, there is advantage from the military. 
>> However, there is an advantage from the military. 
Most people look back upon their past and then they decided to change their lifestyle in a good way. 
>> Most people look back upon their past and then they decide to change their lifestyle in a good way. 
So many people believe that military service provide the incredible experience that might help peol
>>  So many people believe that military service provides the incredible experience that might help people change for the better.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
129073 season food ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-26 1
129072 Homework ¼Û*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-26 5111
129071 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-26 4487
129070   If you could have it your way, how would you like to... ¹Ý* ¿Ï·á 2023-06-26 3640
129069 Writing task ¾È*Çü ¿Ï·á 2023-06-26 2949
129068 What kind of second job do you want to have? ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-26 4682
129067 Homework ÀÌ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-06-26 4085
129066 Homework ÀÌ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-06-26 3607
129065 Homework È«*¼± ¿Ï·á 2023-06-26 1
129064 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-26 3789
129063 How can you say that a country has a good leader? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-06-26 0
129062 Do you leave confidential information in a voice mail? ±¸*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-06-25 1
129061 Should the fashion industry use models that look more like... ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-06-25 2820
129060 Who is the person you admire the most? Why? ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-06-25 4926
129059 Should cell phones be allowed at school? Why or why not? ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-06-25 4193
129058 Night¡¯s sleep Á¶*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-25 4218
129057 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-06-25 4097
129056 HOMEWORK1 ÀÌ*½Â ¿Ï·á 2023-06-25 1
129055 Writing Task 0623 À¯*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-25 1
129054 Are you a health-conscious person? ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-25 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04