¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What is your feeling about mandatory military service in your country? Do you think that your countr

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*ÇÏ
2023-01-27 1071

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

All people say with one voice that we'd better not to go to the army if it is possible. All men who have don't have health problem must serve as a soldier in Korea. It is one of the major obligations people should follow. I went to the army when I was 20 years old as a military police. I had a lot of hard time due to the crazy culture that juniors had to run all the time, respect to seniors with weird way and do all the stuffs. It considered as a normal practice that seniors beat and threaten juniors. Although, soldier spent hard time to get millitary trainning, they couldn't take a rest very well because they needed to stay in same building there, they were not allowed to go home after work. It is a main problem of the military service. However, there is advantage from the military. Most people look back upon their past and then they decided to change their lifestyle in a good way. So many people believe that military service provide the incredible experience that might help peol

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Sir Hwang!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille

All people say with one voice that we'd better not to go to the army if it is possible. 
>> CORRECT! 
All men who have don't have health problem must serve as a soldier in Korea. 
>> All men who don't have health problems must serve as a soldier in Korea. 
OR >>  All men who don't have medical concerns must serve as a soldier in Korea.
It is one of the major obligations people should follow. 
>> CORRECT! 
I went to the army when I was 20 years old as a military police. 
>> CORRECT! 
OR >> I went to the army when I was 20 years old as a soldier. 
I had a lot of hard time due to the crazy culture that juniors had to run all the time, respect to seniors with weird way and do all the stuffs. 
>> I had a lot of hard time due to the crazy culture that juniors had to run all the time, respect seniors ina weird way, and do all the stuffs. 
It considered as a normal practice that seniors beat and threaten juniors. 
>> CORRECT! 
Although, soldier spent hard time to get millitary trainning, they couldn't take a rest very well because they needed to stay in same building there, they were not allowed to go home after work. 
>> Although soldiers spent hard time to go to the military training, they couldn't take a rest very well because they needed to stay in same building, they were not allowed to go home after work. 
It is a main problem of the military service. 
>> It is the main problem of the military service. 
However, there is advantage from the military. 
>> However, there is an advantage from the military. 
Most people look back upon their past and then they decided to change their lifestyle in a good way. 
>> Most people look back upon their past and then they decide to change their lifestyle in a good way. 
So many people believe that military service provide the incredible experience that might help peol
>>  So many people believe that military service provides the incredible experience that might help people change for the better.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
127178 HOMRWORK ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-04-04 0
127177 Homework ¿ì*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-04 1259
127176 Homework 3 ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-04 1690
127175 Use these following words in a sentence ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-04-04 1410
127174 What do you think can be improved at the conference? Share your... ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-04-04 2
127173 What is the best life advice you have ever received from someone? ·ù*¼± ¿Ï·á 2023-04-04 2
127172 What is the drinking (alcohol) culture in your country? Áö* ¿Ï·á 2023-04-04 2
127171 Why do people like eating junk food? ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-04-04 1
127170 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-04-04 0
127169 Is it always good to skip meals? Why do you think some people... Áö* ¿Ï·á 2023-04-04 2
127168 Tuesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-04-04 1476
127167 How will your life be different when you reach your old age? õ*¶õ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-04 3
127166 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-04-04 0
127165 What are some causes of sensitive teeth? Áö* ¿Ï·á 2023-04-04 1
127164 Does your country provide free dental treatments? Áö* ¿Ï·á 2023-04-04 1
127163 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-04-04 0
127162 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-04-04 1148
127161 4.4 homework ±Ç*¸² ¿Ï·á 2023-04-04 1063
127160 4.4 Homework ¹Ú*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-04 1462
127159 What do you do when someone you need to talk to is a million... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-04 1825

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04