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Do you agree with “chemical castration” as punishment for more child sex offenders?

작성자: 황*하
2023-02-10 1595

회원님의 영작문

I think that chemical castration can be the most effect measure to prevent additional crime. We have seen a lot of offenders who commited brutal crime and repeat it again and again. There is a healing program for prisoners to prevent reoffending following their release in the jail. Although, prisoners take a lot of education inculding psychological treatment, reoffending rate is still high. I think that major reason keeping high crimine rate is lenient sentence. Somehow, judges final ruling is not enough to meet people's general expectaion. They insist that heavy sentense can't be the way to reduce or prevent crime. They think proper trainning in the jail is more effective to prevent citizens. According to the report published by professional group shows significant evidence that psychological and emotional treatment is more successful than heavy sentense. However, we don't want to be exposed in the dangerouos situation due to criminals who was released from the jail. We need stronger

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Good day, Sir Hwang!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille

I think that chemical castration can be the most effect measure to prevent additional crime. 
>> I think that chemical castration can be the most effective measure to prevent additional crimes. 
We have seen a lot of offenders who commited brutal crime and repeat it again and again. 
>> We have seen a lot of offenders who committed brutal crime and repeat it again and again. 
OR >> We have seen a lot of offenders who committed brutal crime and repeat all over again. 
There is a healing program for prisoners to prevent reoffending following their release in the jail. 
>> CORRECT!
Although, prisoners take a lot of education inculding psychological treatment, reoffending rate is still high. 
>> Although, prisoners take a lot of education including psychological treatment, reoffending rate is still high. 
I think that major reason keeping high crimine rate is lenient sentence. 
>> I think that major reason why the crime rate keeps going high is because lenient sentences. 
OR >> I think that major reason why the crime rate keeps going high is because lenient punishments. 
Somehow, judges final ruling is not enough to meet people's general expectaion. 
>> Somehow, judges final ruling is not enough to meet people's general expectations. 
They insist that heavy sentense can't be the way to reduce or prevent crime. 
>> They insist that heavy sentence can't be the way to reduce or prevent crimes. 
They think proper trainning in the jail is more effective to prevent citizens. 
>> They think proper training in the jail is more effective to prevent citizens. 
According to the report published by professional group shows significant evidence that psychological and emotional treatment is more successful than heavy sentense. 
>> According to the report published by professional group, they show significant evidences that psychological and emotional treatment is more successful than a heavy sentence. 
However, we don't want to be exposed in the dangerouos situation due to criminals who was released from the jail.
>> However, we don't want to be exposed to the dangerous situation due to criminals who were released from the jail.
We need stronger
>> We need stronger punishments and strict policies.
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