¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Peace of world

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Á¶*¿µ
2023-03-13 942

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think it¡¯s kind of difficult before rid themselves of greed.
The reasons of war are greeds.
Even through it¡¯s difficult to be in peace, but we always try to solve the problem of world.
Always we have to think about living together world people.
Then we get better little by little.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Yeong!
This is a very simple and direct answer.
This is actually a good answer.
Thanks:)
~~ Teacher James
I think it¡¯s kind of difficult before rid themselves of greed.
>>> I believe it will be difficult for them to overcome their greed.
The reasons of war are greeds.
>>>Greed is the root cause of war.
Even through it¡¯s difficult to be in peace, but we always try to solve the problem of world.
>>> Even though it is difficult to live in peace, we always strive to solve the world's problems.
Always we have to think about living together world people.
>>> We must always consider how people around the world coexist.
Then we get better little by little.
>>> CORRECT
>>OR: Then we gradually get better.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
126197 Homework ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-03-03 1
126196 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-03 1
126195 Answer : What do you think is the best game of all time? Á¤*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-03 1438
126194 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-03 0
126193 My favorite food Áö* ¿Ï·á 2023-03-03 1
126192 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-03-03 1
126191 HOMEWORK FOR TODAY: ESSAY: What is your hobby? Why? ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-03-03 0
126190 If you were a precious stone (example: ruby, diamond, jade),... ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-03 1073
126189 unit 4. homework °ø*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-03-03 1227
126188 Friday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-03-03 967
126187 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-03-03 1
126186 I\'m not thing changed À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-03-03 1394
126185 Some people drink protein shakes or eat any other kind of food... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-03 1562
126184 The difference between a house and a home. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-03-03 1050
126183 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-03-03 0
126182 Homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-03-03 1057
126181 homework Æí*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-03 1
126180 I like my basketball play. ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-03 2
126179 If you were a snack, what would you be and why? ¹Ú*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-03-03 1051
126178 3/3 homework ÃÖ*º½ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-03 1063

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04