¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework 03.20

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2023-03-20 1513

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

There are so many kind of drinks at the convenience store or grocery story.
Among them, I introduce a drink that is popular in South_Korea these days.
These days, zero calorie drinks are the most popular in Korea.
So, many kind of drinks were released, like diet coke.
There are reduce calories by adding seasoning instead of sugar.
It's not complete zero calories, but It's become popular because
it is low in calories. For example, low calorie foods are also popular these days.
The trend started because of people want to eat food, but they are worried about
High-calories.
So, low-calories food and drinks are trending in Korea.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille



There are so many kind of drinks at the convenience store or grocery story.
>> There are so many kinds of drinks at the convenience store or grocery store.
Among them, I introduce a drink that is popular in South Korea these days.
>> CORRECT!
These days, zero calorie drinks are the most popular in Korea.
>> CORRECT!
So, many kind of drinks were released, like diet coke.
>> So, many kinds of drinks were released, like diet coke.
There are reduce calories by adding seasoning instead of sugar.
>> There are drinks with reduced calories because they add seasoning instead of sugar.
It's not complete zero calories, but It's become popular because
it is low in calories. 
>> It's not completely zero calories, but it has become popular because it is low in calories. 
For example, low calorie foods are also popular these days.
>> CORRECT!
The trend started because of people want to eat food, but they are worried about
High-calories.
>> The trend started because of people who want to eat food, but they are worried about High-calories.
So, low-calories food and drinks are trending in Korea.
>>  So, low-calorie food and drinks are trending in Korea.
OR >> So, food and drinks with low calories are a trend in Korea.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
126170 1. Vacation -Homework °û*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-03 1333
126169 H.W ±Ç*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-03-03 1301
126168 If marriage will not be for you in the next 5 years, what should... ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-03-02 3
126167 2023-3/2 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-02 1565
126166 Homework ³ª*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-03-02 2
126165 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-03-02 1572
126164 The busy person. ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-03-02 1524
126163 Photo makes the world special. ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-02 1
126162 Homework ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-03-02 2063
126161 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-03-02 1
126160 Gramma ÃÖ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-02 1
126159 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-03-02 7
126158 homework 03.02 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-03-02 1515
126157 Is physical health more important than mental health? ÀÌ*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-03-02 3
126156 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-02 1494
126155 homework ½Å*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-03-02 0
126154 unicorn ¹Ú*¶÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-02 1564
126153 Mobile phone ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-02 1
126152 My nighttime routine! ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-03-02 1715
126151 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-02 1176

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04