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영작교정 게시판

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자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
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담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

Are there other ways for your government to come up with a supplementary budget aside from raising t

작성자: 황*하
2023-04-21 1388

회원님의 영작문

The government's buget comes from taxes, there aren't any ways to make supplementary buget. So, I think the best way to come up with extra money is saving money in a unnecessary businesses like pedestrian passage construction, direct subsidy to some people blindly and ineffective welfare. In a democratic country, the use and collect of taxes varies by rulling party's values. In general, conservative party doesn't to raise tax rate and doesn't want to involve at market. It believes that the market find resonable price by themselves. On the other hand, progressive party insists that people's happiness can be achieved by enough wefare system. So. they want to charge more taxes to richer and then government distribute it for poorer. I support progressive party because I believe that people were born without any choice. Someone was born in poor family but the others were born in rich. There are a few cases that poorer become richer as their efforts but many people still don't have chance

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Good day, Sir Hwang!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille

The government's buget comes from taxes, there aren't any ways to make supplementary buget. 
>> The government's budget comes from taxes, there aren't any ways to make supplementary budget. 
So, I think the best way to come up with extra money is saving money in a unnecessary businesses like pedestrian passage construction, direct subsidy to some people blindly and ineffective welfare. 
>> So, I think the best way to come up with extra money is saving money in unnecessary businesses like pedestrian passage construction, direct subsidy to some people blindly and ineffective welfare. 
In a democratic country, the use and collect of taxes varies by rulling party's values. 
>> In a democratic country, the use and collect of taxes varies by ruling party's values. 
In general, conservative party doesn't to raise tax rate and doesn't want to involve at market. 
>> In general, the conservative party doesn't raise tax rate and doesn't want to get involved in the market. 
It believes that the market find resonable price by themselves. 
>> It is believed that the market find reasonable price by themselves. 
On the other hand, progressive party insists that people's happiness can be achieved by enough wefare system. 
>> On the other hand, progressive party insists that people's happiness can be achieved by enough welfares system. 
So. they want to charge more taxes to richer and then government distribute it for poorer. 
>> So, they want to charge more taxes to the rich and then the government distributes it to the poor. 
I support progressive party because I believe that people were born without any choice. 
>> CORRECT!
Someone was born in poor family but the others were born in rich. 
>> Someone was born in poor family but the others were born rich. 
There are a few cases that poorer become richer as their efforts but many people still don't have chance
>> There are a few cases that poorer become richer as their efforts but many people still don't have chance to be in that state.
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