¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2023-06-21 3371

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Hi, T.Donna.
I just arrived at home.
As you expected, we had a blast all day.
We went to the amusement park "Lotte world", and took various rides, and saw a beautiful parade.
It's been many years after we went there before.
There were so crowded on last time, but not too many people today.
To save our time, we purchased the special ticket "magic pass" which we could take many rides without waiting.
It was expensive and I was worried if we could use all tickets.
We spent all of those though.
Many rides made us up and down quickly, especially Spanish pirat ship and Gyro drop.
Irene and I really enjoyed many scared attractions.
If you go there, you should take the "Gyro drop".
It just lasts a few seconds, but you can feel the ultimate fear about falling down from the air.
After enjoying there, we came home and celebrated my daughters' birthday with cake.
As for my assignment, a first tardness could be forgiven, I think.
Of course, they should know how much they did wrong.
See you soon.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Dr. Kim!

Celebrating your daughters birthday is to look back to the days they were born and remembering each year as a fateful journey as they become older towards their teenage years. I absolutely agree with you. Nothing beats quality time with the kids. As a mother, regardless if it is my  son's birthday, we would wonder in the park together pretending like life has no problems and sorrows playing like we are both children.

It is so delightful to know that you tried most of the rides. The Gyro Drop freaks me out and gives the feeling of leaving your soul out of your body! ^^ You are both so brave. To release all the anxiety, one needs to really shout it out loud to release the tension. Perhaps your little girls and wife would want to be back there again soon.

At last, there is no reason for being late. If all people respect time, they ought to try their best to be on time. It entails discipline and constant practice.

Thank you very much for standing by my comments and suggestion. I had a rough day with my computer and electric power. Nevertheless, I noted just a few grammar pointers for you to study. Generally, you got a big percentage of your sentences correctly, well done!

See you later . 

-T. Donna~

Hi, T.Donna.
>> Correct!

I just arrived at home.
>> Correct!

As you expected, we had a blast all day.
>> Correct!

We went to the amusement park "Lotte world", and took various rides, and saw a beautiful parade.
>> Correct!
Or: Lotte World

It's been many years after we went there before.
>> It's been many years after we went there.

There were so crowded on last time, but not too many people today.
>> It was so crowded last time, but there were not too many people today.

To save our time, we purchased the special ticket "magic pass" which we could take many rides without waiting.
>> Correct!

It was expensive and I was worried if we could use all tickets.
>> Correct!

We spent all of those though.
>> Correct!

Many rides made us up and down quickly, especially Spanish pirat ship and Gyro drop.
>> Many rides made us up and down quickly, especially the Spanish Pirate Ship and Gyro Drop.

Irene and I really enjoyed many scared attractions.
>>  Irene and I really enjoyed many scary attractions.

If you go there, you should take the "Gyro drop".
>> Correct!
Or: If you go there, you should take the "Gyro Drop".

It just lasts a few seconds, but you can feel the ultimate fear about falling down from the air.
>> Correct!

After enjoying there, we came home and celebrated my daughters' birthday with cake.
>> Correct!

As for my assignment, a first tardness could be forgiven, I think.
>> Correct!
Or: tardiness

Of course, they should know how much they did wrong.
>> Correct!

See you soon.
>> Correct!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
129494 meet the new person. ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 4328
129493 What Korean food would you like recommend and why? ÀÌ*´Ã ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 4034
129492 How would you describe a perfect weekend? ÀÌ*´Ã ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 5712
129491 homework Àå*¼® ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 5723
129490 The biggest choice in my life! ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 4538
129489 Home work ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 4405
129488 homework 07.13 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 3397
129487 Day2 ½Å*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 2
129486 How important do you think food is when traveling? Do you think... ¹Ý* ¿Ï·á 2023-07-12 5451
129485 What\'s your thought on this new business called the streaming... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-07-12 2
129484 Home work ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-07-12 0
129483 HOMEWORK Àå*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-07-12 3517
129482 The city I want to live ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-07-12 3968
129481 What pet do you have at the home? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-07-12 5816
129480 Homework ÀÌ*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-12 3740
129479 2023.7.12 homework ±è*»è ¿Ï·á 2023-07-12 4862
129478 Homework ±è*¶õ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-12 1
129477 What\'s your favorite day of the week and why? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-07-12 6243
129476 What would you like to invent and why? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-07-12 4510
129475 What kind of dancing do people in your country like? Is there... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-07-12 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04