¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

sign of aging

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*ȯ
2023-07-19 4129

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I can easily find sign of aging when I get some weight. I can not eat much more than before but I have gotten some weight. I am into running, so even I run 2-3 times a week I have gotten some weight. I have to try harder training for constant my body.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good evening, Thomas! It is wonderful to see you here on the composition page.

I totally agree that at the age of 30's, getting rid of calories is such a difficult thing to achieve. Hence, we have to be very mindful of our food intake as well as the increased number of physical activities we engage in.

Below, I read a very well-written homework answer. Your writing demonstrates very good syntax (arrangement of words) as well as diction (correct choice of words) to create a systematic and logical idea. Please go over some of my grammar suggestions and always keep them in mind. You have done excellent for this homework!

See you again in class tomorrow.

-T. Donna~

I can easily find sign of aging when I get some weight. 
>> Correct!
Or: I can easily find a sign of aging when I (get/ gain) some weight. 

I can not eat much more than before but I have gotten some weight. 
>> Correct!

I am into running, so even I run 2-3 times a week I have gotten some weight. 
>>  I am into running, so even if I run 2-3 times a week I have gotten some weight.  Very good sentence!

I have to try harder training for constant my body.
>> Correct!
Or: I have to try harder training my body constantly.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
131511 How do you usually solve a stressful situation? Share your... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-10-09 1
131510 My favorite character is always trying for dreams and taking... À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-10-09 5356
131509 I don\'t know. À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-10-09 4496
131508 WRITING TASK: What kind of meeting do you always want to attend? ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-10-09 4
131507 Soccer ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-10-09 5001
131506 Letter ±Ç*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-09 1
131505 Today\'s homework ÀÌ*µµ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-08 4038
131504 Homework Á¤*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-08 4928
131503 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-08 4071
131502 How was my fishing ÃÖ*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-08 4629
131501 A few extra hours in a day ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-10-08 3747
131500 Making a reservation. ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-08 0
131499 Trip ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-08 1
131498 HOMEWORK-231006 ¾ç*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2023-10-08 1
131497 homwork ¹Ú*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-07 2
131496 Describe a party you attended. ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-10-07 1
131495 Are ther any books that have had a profound impact on your life... ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-10-07 4289
131494 Are you happy with the programs on TV nowadays? ±è*¼ø ¿Ï·á 2023-10-06 4333
131493 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-06 5337
131492 WRITING TASK: Who do you want to go to a cinema with? Why? ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-10-06 4

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04