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What happens when both parents work?

작성자: 반*
2023-08-08 4038

회원님의 영작문

If both parents work, there would be two types of parents.

One is the parents who work for a company, they can leave work at before dinner and able to take care of the children in the evening. And the other parents who have own business especially restaurant business, I think they don’t have enough time to take care of their children

In the former case, it is possible to spend time with children after work and after school, so parents can take more care of their children’s relationships and development, which can have a good effect.

In the latter case, It would be difficult to take care children’s studies, friendships, and interests due to living. And it is likely to give a negative impact to children in growth.

Of course, if you interfere too much in the former case, your children will have a hard time, but I will choose the former parents.

I want to make pleasant memory and environments for children in the harsh world

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Thank you for this Philip. Like what they say, parents are the first social circle of their children. Therefore, it is necessary that parents provide a loving and nurturing environment to their kids.

If both parents work, there would be two types of parents.
>>>  correct 
One is the parents who work for a company, they can leave work at before dinner and able to take care of the children in the evening. 
>>> One is the parent who works for a company, they can leave work before dinner time and able to take care of the children in the evening.   
And the other parents who have own business especially restaurant business, I think they don’t have enough time to take care of their children
>>>   And the other parent who has his/her own business especially running a restaurant, I think they don’t have enough time to take care of their children
In the former case, it is possible to spend time with children after work and after school, so parents can take more care of their children’s relationships and development which can 
have a good effect.
>>> correct   
In the latter case, It would be difficult to take care children’s studies, friendships, and interests due to living.
>>>  In the latter case, It would be difficult to take care of children’s studies, friendships, and interests due to living. 
And it is likely to give a negative impact to children in growth.
>>> And it is likely to give a negative impact on children's growth.
Of course, if you interfere too much in the former case, your children will have a hard time, but I will choose the former parents.
>>> correct   
I want to make pleasant memory and environment for children in the harsh world
>>>   correct 
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