¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework 08.14

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2023-08-14 4350

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
Why do you think people are afraid of getting old?

Most people don't want getting old, they want to stay young and healthy.
The last places most elderly people stay are nursing homes or hospitals.
That's why it is difficult to control body when get old.
So they have to get help from other people.
Other case is olden people have nowhere to go.
In case of Korea, olden people can use public transportation for free.
Their daily routine is sit on the subway and bus all day and look around other people.
Or their spend time with similar situation people in subway and go back home at night.
Many people think that their future will be similar to the current old people.
And sometimes watched that old people have no manners in public area.
That's why many people don't like getting old.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
Why do you think people are afraid of getting old?


Most people don't want getting old, they want to stay young and healthy.
>> Most people don't want to get old, they want to stay young and healthy.
The last places most elderly people stay are nursing homes or hospitals.
>> CORRECT!
That's why it is difficult to control body when get old.
>> That's why it is difficult to control our bodies as we get old.
So they have to get help from other people.
>> CORRECT!
Other case is olden people have nowhere to go.
>> In other cases, some old people have nowhere to go.
In case of Korea, olden people can use public transportation for free.
>> In case of Korea, old people can use public transportation for free.
OR >> In case of Korea, senior citizens can use public transportation for free.
Their daily routine is sit on the subway and bus all day and look around other people.
>> Their daily routine is to sit on the subway and bus all day and look at other people.
Or their spend time with similar situation people in subway and go back home at night.
>> Sometimes, they spend time with similar situation with people in subway and go back home at night.
Many people think that their future will be similar to the current old people.
>> CORRECT!
And sometimes watched that old people have no manners in public area.
>> And sometimes, they think that watching old people isn't good.
That's why many people don't like getting old.
>> CORRECT!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
132578 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-20 4998
132577 What benefits do you think meditation brings? ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-11-20 1
132576 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about \"Is it important... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-11-20 1
132575 Hardest working out ÃÖ*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-20 4559
132574 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-20 0
132573 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-20 0
132572 homework Á¤*¾È ¿Ï·á 2023-11-20 0
132571 South Korea have diifferent accents! ±è*ºó ¿Ï·á 2023-11-20 0
132570 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-11-20 4794
132569 diary ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-20 0
132568 What is the most fun while studying ¹Ú*À² ¿Ï·á 2023-11-20 3060
132567 Library ÀÌ*¼º ¿Ï·á 2023-11-20 0
132566 homework ¾È*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-20 4394
132565 The effect of ads ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-20 5110
132564 Similar character ÀÓ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-11-20 3744
132563 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-11-20 3848
132562 homework ¾È*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-20 5502
132561 Survey ±Ç*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-20 1
132560 welfare ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-20 5473
132559 What do you prefer, to eat everything you like, drink a lot,... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-20 5697

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04