¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Focus something on my life.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*ȯ
2023-08-17 2437

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think the important things in my life are health, work and happiness.
I saw the video on YouTube, he said the person who has succeed dose not become happy, the person who is happy become success. If we are happy the work and health are followed.
So I focus on my happiness and find out what kind of things make me happy.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Thomas!

I could not agree more with every point you made here on your homework answer. What is the point of living if we are not happy? If we live in hell, then, it's not living life at all. So, our happiness never depends on our family, friends, or lover. It is something we create within ourselves by cultivating gratitude, compassion, and peace. If we are not happy, we cannot give this to other people. Stay happy even when you break your heart and train yourself to see the silver lining in every dark situation.

Your composition was powerful and moving. I cannot sense that your heart was broken. ^^

Thank you for your effort in sharing you experience and knowing how to be happy.

See you!

-T. Donna~

I think the important things in my life are health, work and happiness.
>> Correct!
Or: I think the important things in my life are health, work, and happiness.

I saw the video on YouTube, he said the person who has succeed dose not become happy, the person who is happy become success. If we are happy the work and health are followed.
>> I saw a video on YouTube, a man said that the person who succeeds does not become happy, the person who is happy become successful. If we are happy, the work and health are follow.

So I focus on my happiness and find out what kind of things make me happy.
>> Correct!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
129930 homework 08.03 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-08-03 2899
129929 Today\'s homework ÀÌ*µµ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-03 2812
129928 Do you think having a hobby is important? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-08-02 3256
129927 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-02 2564
129926 Homework ±è*¶õ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-02 0
129925 If you were a worker, what would make you quit your job? Why? ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-08-02 2
129924 homework Á¶*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-02 3624
129923 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-08-02 3333
129922 Why is it important to study English? ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-02 4649
129921 What do you think is the best part about owning a dog? ÀÌ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2023-08-02 0
129920 Why do you think children likes chocolate? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-08-02 3497
129919 If you had a piggy bank, what would you use the money you¡¯re... ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-02 3254
129918 Homework ÀÌ*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-02 4238
129917 What do you think of the new generation right now? How are you... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-08-02 3817
129916 Traveling! ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-08-02 3355
129915 What places are you planning ti visit? ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-02 2842
129914 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-02 0
129913 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-02 0
129912 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-02 3484
129911 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-02 3038

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04