¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Today\'s homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*µµ
2023-08-30 2936

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

ESSAY: Nowadays, more and more people from different cities are spending more time away from their families. What are the possible reasons and the effects on the people themselves and their families?

Nowadays, people don't gather as familly. They scatter each other because of their duty.
When they marriaged people and no child, he or she can move their jobs.
He puts his wife and then go to the other cities to keep his jobs.
if they have a baby, can go to the better place for child education.
There are many things that we live different place each other.
The bad things are that it makes bad feeling such as blue, sad, lonely, and anger.
And these make family bronken.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello there Lee~!^^ You know what I want to eat kimchi now. Hahaha! I will buy later. Anyway, thank for your homework! Keep up the good work!
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
Nowadays, people don't gather as familly. 
>>> CORRECT~!^^
They scatter each other because of their duty.
>>> They're scattered in different place because of their duty.
When they marriaged people and no child, he or she can move their jobs.
>>> Unmarried people can move anywhere for their job. 
He puts his wife and then go to the other cities to keep his jobs.
>>> Fathers leave their wives then go to the other cities to keep their jobs.
if they have a baby, can go to the better place for child education.
>>> If they have children, they can choose a better place for their children's education. 
There are many things that we live different place each other.
>>> There are many reasons why we live separately from each other. 
The bad things are that it makes bad feeling such as blue, sad, lonely, and anger.
>>> The disadvantage is that it makes us feel bad, feel blue, sad, lonely and angry. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
132475 In English, there are sick jokes, private jokes, cruel jokes,... À±*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-11-16 2
132474 My extrovert trait ÀÓ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-11-16 3674
132473 WRITING TASK: What is the most important organization in your... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-11-16 7
132472 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-16 4014
132471 Homework Á¤*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-16 10
132470 15.Nov.2023 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-16 1
132469 Tell something about the housework that you usually do in... ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-16 4513
132468 What do you like most about your bedroom? Answer in no more than... ÀÌ*ºó ¿Ï·á 2023-11-16 4070
132467 How do long distance relations last? ÀÌ*ºó ¿Ï·á 2023-11-16 5066
132466 Share a thing that never fails to make you smile. ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-11-16 5140
132465 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-15 4728
132464 What is the most recognized symbol you know? Write something... ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-15 1
132463 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-15 3
132462 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-11-15 4963
132461 homework ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-11-15 4752
132460 My wish ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-11-15 3047
132459 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-15 5725
132458 Should schools have more field trips? Why? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-15 4185
132457 Feeling pressure about my future ÀÌ*¼Ö ¿Ï·á 2023-11-15 3742
132456 Do you like playing sports? ±Ç*¸ð ¿Ï·á 2023-11-15 3831

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04