¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Today\'s homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*µµ
2023-09-06 2711

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

ESSAY: Although parents are responsible for raising a child, outside influence plays a key role in their development. To what extent do you agree or disagree

factor of outside impacts children's growing. But the most important thing i think is the attention of parents.
parent's expression gives mant impact they children. they must not release there feeling to children.
if they are swayed by emotions, children can't choose right action and he or she can't grow social relationship.
children's relationship affect their life. people who don't give education may become criminal.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Lee! How are you? Well, today is a special day because it's my birthday. Hahaha! I don't have any plans yet. Talk to you tomorrow. Take care!
>>> TEACHER GEMMA 
factor of outside impacts children's growing. 
>>> Children's development is impacted by external factors.
But the most important thing i think is the attention of parents.
>>> However, the most important thing is the parents' attention. 
parent's expression gives mant impact they children.
>>> The way parents act has a big impact on their children. 
 they must not release there feeling to children.
>>> They should not be so emotional in front of their children.
if they are swayed by emotions, children can't choose right action and he or she can't grow social relationship.
>>> Children cannot make moral decisions or develop healthy social relationships if they are influenced by their parents' emotions.
children's relationship affect their life. 
>>> Children's social relationship can affect their lives. 
people who don't give education may become criminal.
>>> Parents who don't educate their children well may turn to criminals someday.  
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
132205 How important do you think is family ties and relations in your... ½Å*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-06 3418
132204 What time do you usually eat your meals everyday? How do you... ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-06 3677
132203 How can you divide your time effectively between work and... ÀÌ*ºó ¿Ï·á 2023-11-06 5498
132202 What do you like doing with your childhood friends whenever you... ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-06 3695
132201 homework_231103 ÇÑ*·Ï ¿Ï·á 2023-11-06 5870
132200 WRITING TASK: What was the fondest memory you had with your... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-11-06 4
132199 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-06 4963
132198 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-06 3122
132197 A valuable lesson or piece of advice you\\\'ve learned... ÀÓ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-11-06 6526
132196 Homework Á¤*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-06 4329
132195 What is something that you regret in the past that you want to... Á¶*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-11-06 0
132194 03.Nov.2023 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-06 1
132193 retirement ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-06 6047
132192 my best running time ÃÖ*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-06 3938
132191 Are there any movies that you can watch over and over again... ÀÌ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-11-05 1
132190 Should employers set aside time during the day for their... ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-11-05 1
132189 What do you think the differences are between male and female... À±*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-11-05 3
132188 Good to experience diversity °­*À² ¿Ï·á 2023-11-05 1
132187 homework ¾È*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-05 4128
132186 What aspects of your city would you complain about? ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-11-05 4495

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04