¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

9/18 homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: À±*Çö
2023-09-19 1939

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I have included in a nuclear family since I was young.
So I have never experienced the advantages and disadvantages of extended family.
I think a nuclear family is not complicated and the possibility of happening adverse events is low, because the number of family members is small.
Also, family members get enough personal space and time for refreshing.
However, sometimes family members can feel lonely in a nuclear family.
I prefer a nuclear family, but in the future I hope to live with my father, mother, my younger sister's family, and my future husband.
It will be great to live with them in a big house with good scenery.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there, Stella! Wow! You did really well in this homework. I only noted very simple matters regarding the sentences that you made. You are really doing great when it comes to improving the sentences you are making. I'm really happy because of that. As always, we will continue to have more practice again in the class. See you there! ~ T. Marie ^^
I have included in a nuclear family since I was young.
>> I have been included in a nuclerar family since I was young. 
So I have never experienced the advantages and disadvantages of extended family.
>> CORRECT SENTENCE
I think a nuclear family is not complicated and the possibility of happening adverse events is low, because the number of family members is small.
>> CORRECT SENTENCE
Also, family members get enough personal space and time for refreshing.
>> Also, family members get enough personal space and time to refresh
However, sometimes family members can feel lonely in a nuclear family.
>> CORRECT SENTENCE
I prefer a nuclear family, but in the future I hope to live with my father, mother, my younger sister's family, and my future husband.
>> CORRECT SENTENCE
It will be great to live with them in a big house with good scenery.
>> CORRECT SENTENCE
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
131267 stalking ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-25 3406
131266 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-25 3418
131265 How do you distinguish which feedback to listen to and which to... ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-25 1
131264 ESSAY ±Ç*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-25 2
131263 HOMEWORK ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-09-25 2954
131262 To share my travel experience. ÃÖ*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-25 2370
131261 Prepared for the blind date ÃÖ*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-25 2992
131260 1. What were the consequences of forgetting that event, if any?... ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-09-24 1
131259 What happens to old people in your family? Do they live with... Á¶*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-09-24 0
131258 Homework ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-09-24 2
131257 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-09-24 0
131256 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-09-24 0
131255 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-24 2293
131254 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-09-24 0
131253 Latest trends in South Korea ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-09-24 2340
131252 What features and functions of a car do you need most? ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-24 1
131251 Do you think it\'s a good idea to study English Literature in... ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-24 1
131250 today\'s homework ÀÌ*µµ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-24 2181
131249 What was your best friendship? Are you still friends with him or... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-09-23 2048
131248 If your friend or family has committed a serious crime, how... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-09-23 2311

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04