¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

harass

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±Ç*Èñ
2023-09-26 3306

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

In traditional times in Korea, family culture was very conservative, strict and patriarchal.

Parents and adult had priviledge of teaching their children strictly even with physical punishment.

Social norms didn't respect the human rigft of children and women.

Even parents harass and abuse their children, it was regarded as education.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good morning, Ms., Lily!
We are in the same boat! People in the past were more focused on punishment and being strict. All countries have experienced a very difficult life and our parents have prepared us by letting us undergo punishment because they believe that through hardships we can face the challenges of the world in a courageous and strong way.
Talk to you later!
Aki~

In traditional times in Korea, family culture was very conservative, strict, and patriarchal.
>>> CORRECT!

Parents and adult had priviledge of teaching their children strictly even with physical punishment.
>>> Parents and adults had the privilege of teaching their children strictly even with physical punishment.

Social norms didn't respect the human rights of children and women.
>>>  CORRECT!

Even parents harass and abuse their children, it was regarded as education.
>>> Even if parents harassed and abused their children, it was regarded as education.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
130382 What makes a better impression, his/her appearance or... ¹Ú*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-22 5567
130381 How can people be encouraged to have healthier lifestyle? ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-08-22 0
130380 a decline letter ÃÖ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-08-22 3385
130379 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-22 3790
130378 What is the best place to live in Korea? ¹Ú*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-22 3912
130377 What things in your home couldn\'t you live without? ¹Ú*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-22 4021
130376 homework essay(2023. 8. 22.) ¼­*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-08-22 1
130375 WRITING TASK: What is a good hotel for you? ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-08-22 2
130374 First impressions last È«*±â ¿Ï·á 2023-08-22 5248
130373 What are the things that people should consider when they travel... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-22 3554
130372 message ¼Û*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-08-22 7
130371 How important is tourism to your country? ±Ç*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-08-22 0
130370 What do you have strong opinions on? ±Ç*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-08-22 1
130369 How important is your safety and well-being? ±Ç*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-08-22 0
130368 execution ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-22 2955
130367 Mission ¼º*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-22 3729
130366 homework Àå*¼® ¿Ï·á 2023-08-22 3986
130365 8/22 °í*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-08-22 4
130364 How can the world make sure human rights are protected? ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-08-22 4637
130363 Create your final spiel ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-08-22 4047

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04