¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework 09.27

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2023-09-27 3173

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
Why do some people think that holidays are a bit stressful? What are the possible reasons?

The reason why we wait for holidays is the rest.
But, some holidays are rather stressful.
One of them is when we meet families get together.
Sometimes I watched TV show about other families stories.
I think there are many rude people in the world.
According to the TV show, the are ask the sensitive questions to other family member.
And even them, they are did steal from their visit homes.
So, some people don't want meet their family members.
Because they don't want get stressed.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
Why do some people think that holidays are a bit stressful? What are the possible reasons?


The reason why we wait for holidays is the rest.
>> The reason why we wait for holidays is because we want to have our rest time.
But, some holidays are rather stressful.
>> CORRECT!
One of them is when we meet families get together.
>> One of them is when we meet families and have a get-together.
OR >> One of them is when we  have a family get-together.
Sometimes I watched TV show about other families stories.
>> Sometimes I watch TV shows about other families' stories.
I think there are many rude people in the world.
>> CORRECT!
According to the TV show, the are ask the sensitive questions to other family member.
>> According to the TV show, the ask sensitive questions to other family members.
And even them, they are did steal from their visit homes.
>> And even them, they did steal something from the homes they visit.
So, some people don't want meet their family members.
>> So, some people don't want to meet their family members.
Because they don't want get stressed.
>> It's because they don't want to get stressed.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
131669 HOMEWORK ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-10-16 4005
131668 16 day\'s homework - Why is English fruency significant for you? ½Å*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-16 3675
131667 human and war ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-16 3446
131666 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-16 4147
131665 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-16 3124
131664 My favorite food Á¤*¾È ¿Ï·á 2023-10-15 3840
131663 If you\'re given a chance to go to Vietnam again, what... ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-15 1
131662 If you\'re given a chance to go to Vietnam again, what... ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-15 3550
131661 homework ¾È*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-15 3350
131660 Today\'s homework ÀÌ*µµ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-15 2483
131659 Since Korea\'s suicide rate is high, are there any programs or... ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-15 6
131658 Homework ÀÌ*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-15 3077
131657 Letter ±Ç*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-15 1
131656 Letter ±Ç*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-15 1
131655 Home work ±è*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-10-15 4512
131654 Trust issue ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-15 3296
131653 What do you like best about your country\'s culture? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-10-14 3022
131652 Do people in your country worry too much about safety? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-10-14 3244
131651 231013- HOMEWORK ¾ç*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2023-10-14 1
131650 Collection ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-10-14 3387

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04