¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ½Å*È­
2023-10-06 3155

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

My husband and children had weak intestines and would often go away. I learned how to cook because I couldn't cook, and because I wasn't interested in health, I didn't care about it, but I studied by listening to lectures on nutritional health and lifestyle habits for the health of my family. So I changed the water, the cooking utensils, the detergents, and most of all, the food I eat. Before, I ate a lot of instant food and delivery food, but now I try to cook my own food and not use a lot of seasoning. Fortunately, with a lot of effort, my family's intestines have improved a lot.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there Eliana, 
I've noticed that most Koreans have weak stomachs, and with that, you become more concerned about the food that you eat. This is also one thing that I've learned, not all food is beneficial ( I am not referring to junk or instant food). Take care!
Aki~

My husband and children had weak intestines and would often go away.
>>> CORRECT!

I learned how to cook because I couldn't cook, and because I wasn't interested in health, I didn't care about it, but I studied by listening to lectures on nutritional health and lifestyle habits for the health of my family.
>>> CORRECT!

So I changed the water, the cooking utensils, the detergents, and most of all, the food I eat.
>>> So I changed our drinking water, cooking utensils, detergents, and most of all, the food I eat.

Before, I ate a lot of instant food and delivery food, but now I try to cook my own food and not use a lot of seasoning.
>>>  Before, I ate a lot of instant and delivery food, but now I try to cook my own food and not use a lot of seasoning.


Fortunately, with a lot of effort, my family's intestines have improved a lot.
>>> CORRECT!
>>> Thankfully, with a lot of precaution, my family's health has improved.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
131343 homework 09.27 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-09-27 2481
131342 If you were to remove one traditional holiday (could be Korean... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-09-27 1
131341 What is something that you are thankful for?ᩚ ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-09-27 1963
131340 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-27 2663
131339 Would you rather play video games or read books all day? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-09-27 3573
131338 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-27 2996
131337 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about ¡°The most... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-09-27 0
131336 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-09-27 2289
131335 The most difficult part of studying English ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-09-27 2569
131334 WRITING TASK: What kind of help do you need from your new... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-09-27 4
131333 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-27 3600
131332 If you had a company, will you hire a professional or an amateur... ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-27 1
131331 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-27 5
131330 why do we need to study English? Á¤*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-27 2208
131329 homwork ¹Ú*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-27 2
131328 Do you think there is still a stigma associated with people who... ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-09-27 1
131327 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-09-26 0
131326 HomeWork °í*ö ¿Ï·á 2023-09-26 2846
131325 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-09-26 1
131324 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-09-26 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04