¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2023-11-07 4925

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Hi, T.Donna.
Today is the coldest day of this autumn.
There were only few patients and clients, so I enjoyed this peaceful moment.
Maybe, Dr. MJ will be frustrated tomorrow about today's profit and number of patients.
He is now enjoying his day off without awareness of this terrible situation.
I guess this situation is caused by sharply decreased temperature outside.
Anyway, I was so pleased to talk with you about the drama "Moving".
As you know, I don't have enough time to spend watching media.
Since I decided to spend more time with my wife, I tried to watch dramas and movies and play games together.
I really hope it will work efficiently to improve our relationship.
Regarding my homework, I felt bad about the heros who can see through, who has a lightening power.
They have very special ablility, but they look so weak.
Lightening man helped at the important moment, but his role was very restricted.
Korea video always shows an empathy, and that's a strong point, I guess.
See you.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Dr. Kim!

As the days get colder and colder, I hope that your profit goes higher and higher. As you mentioned, Dr. MJ will take care of this. Hope that he does not disappoint. ^^

First of all, as I was checking your homework, as you can see below, your sentences were almost all correct all the way down. Well done on that part. Moreover, the length and depth of your sentences are longer as well. You used adverbs, adjectives, and verbs appropriately as well as a good set of vocabulary. Carry on!

In truth, I also do not watch a lot of drama. I thought it is a waste of time since there are a lot of work to do. However, there are certain dramas and movies worth our time and when we like them, we binge-watch. As a result, we may lack sleep.

Perhaps when we watch a drama, we can put ourselves in the situation of the characters and pretend we are them. After all, our everyday life is also surrounded by drama with our family relations, work conditions, and the many functions we have in society.

Thank you for your time, effort, and diligence!

-T. Donna~

Hi, T.Donna.
>> Correct!

Today is the coldest day of this autumn.
>> Correct!

There were only few patients and clients, so I enjoyed this peaceful moment.
>> Correct!

Maybe, Dr. MJ will be frustrated tomorrow about today's profit and number of patients.
>> Correct!

He is now enjoying his day off without awareness of this terrible situation.
>> Correct!

I guess this situation is caused by sharply decreased temperature outside.
>> Correct!

Anyway, I was so pleased to talk with you about the drama "Moving".
>> Correct!

As you know, I don't have enough time to spend watching media.
>> Correct!

Since I decided to spend more time with my wife, I tried to watch dramas and movies and play games together.
>> Correct!

I really hope it will work efficiently to improve our relationship.
>> Correct!

Regarding my homework, I felt bad about the heros who can see through, who has a lightening power.
>> Correct!
Or: Regarding my homework, I felt bad about the heroes who can see through, the one who has a lightening power.

They have very special ablility, but they look so weak.
>> They have very special abilities, but they look so weak.

Lightening man helped at the important moment, but his role was very restricted.
>> Correct!

Korea video always shows an empathy, and that's a strong point, I guess.
>> Korean video always shows empathy, and that's a strong point, I guess.

See you.
>> Correct!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
131512 electricity is a very good invention. À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-10-09 3357
131511 How do you usually solve a stressful situation? Share your... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-10-09 1
131510 My favorite character is always trying for dreams and taking... À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-10-09 5366
131509 I don\'t know. À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-10-09 4497
131508 WRITING TASK: What kind of meeting do you always want to attend? ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-10-09 4
131507 Soccer ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-10-09 5006
131506 Letter ±Ç*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-09 1
131505 Today\'s homework ÀÌ*µµ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-08 4045
131504 Homework Á¤*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-08 4931
131503 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-08 4074
131502 How was my fishing ÃÖ*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-08 4636
131501 A few extra hours in a day ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-10-08 3751
131500 Making a reservation. ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-08 0
131499 Trip ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-08 1
131498 HOMEWORK-231006 ¾ç*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2023-10-08 1
131497 homwork ¹Ú*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-07 2
131496 Describe a party you attended. ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-10-07 1
131495 Are ther any books that have had a profound impact on your life... ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-10-07 4293
131494 Are you happy with the programs on TV nowadays? ±è*¼ø ¿Ï·á 2023-10-06 4339
131493 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-06 5337

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04