¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

pention

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±Ç*Èñ
2023-11-16 5175

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

It is sad the word 'elder poverty'.

At the end of life, if we suffer from poverty and disease we are very unhappy.

There has big problem a basic pention in Korea.

All the age of 65 receive the same pention even the rich and wealthy.

I argue that basic pension should be divided according to their property and occupational pensions.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Ms. Lily!
It is indeed a sad thing that elderly people end up being poor, not only in your country but globally. A lot of people have not prepared for their retirement so there are times when they rely on their children. Another connected issue here is when their children can't support them, where are they going to get their basic needs?
Aki~

It is sad the word 'elder poverty'. 
>>> The word elderly poverty sounds sad.

At the end of life, if we suffer from poverty and disease we are very unhappy.
>>> CORRECT!
OR >>> At the end of life, suffering from poverty and disease causes great unhappiness.

There has big problem a basic pention in Korea.
>>> There is a big problem a basic pensions in Korea.

All the age of 65 receive the same pention even the rich and wealthy.
>>> All the age of 65, everyone receives the same pension even the rich and wealthy.

I argue that basic pensions should be divided according to their property and occupational pensions.
>>> CORRECT!
OR >> I propose that basic pensions should be split based on property and occupational pensions.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
134924 The best thing about my grandma ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-02-22 2291
134923 Why do you think people are dbsessed with their heights? Give at... ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-22 2
134922 Sound suggestions ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-02-22 2819
134921 How do you know about cats? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-02-22 3048
134920 Do you have a piggy bank? ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-02-22 2053
134919 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-22 2
134918 I ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-22 1638
134917 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-22 2190
134916 Homework ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-02-22 1
134915 Moving to a different part of a country after the retirement ÀÓ*¼± ¿Ï·á 2024-02-22 2254
134914 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-02-22 5
134913 Is it important to have a good childhood to be successful in... ¼­*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-22 2616
134912 When was the last time you streamed a movie, and what streaming... ¼­*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-22 2648
134911 Which country do you think is not a safe place to live in? Ȳ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-02-22 2437
134910 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-02-22 2560
134909 How does your bank support the local community through... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-02-22 3
134908 Homework À±*¼± ¿Ï·á 2024-02-22 3188
134907 homework ±è*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-02-22 0
134906 The new resolution ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-22 2
134905 What fusion-food would you like to try? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2024-02-22 2498

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04