¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework 11.16

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2023-11-16 4376

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
What are the biggest problems with living in cities?

One of the big reasons for living in city is convenience.
This is because of the transportation, cultural life, and convenience facilities located in city.
But, these days problems with living in cities is housing supply problem.
Many office workers prefer their companies located in Seoul.
And people who lived in the country side or living in cities people want to work in Seoul.
So, many office workers gather and want to live in Seoul.
However, there are It's hard to find the house they want.
In addition, young people want to leave country side and want live in Seoul.
So the problem is getting bad.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
What are the biggest problems with living in cities?


One of the big reasons for living in city is convenience.
>> One of the big reasons for living in the city is convenience.
This is because of the transportation, cultural life, and convenience facilities located in city.
>> This is because of the transportation, cultural life, and convenient facilities located in city.
But, these days problems with living in cities is housing supply problem.
>> But, the problem these days about living in cities is the lack of homes.
Many office workers prefer their companies located in Seoul.
>> Many office workers prefer their companies be located in Seoul.
And people who lived in the country side or living in cities people want to work in Seoul.
>> And people who both live in the countryside or in cities want to work in Seoul.
So, many office workers gather and want to live in Seoul.
>> CORRECT!
However, there are It's hard to find the house they want.
>> However, it's hard to find the house they want.
In addition, young people want to leave country side and want live in Seoul.
>> In addition, young people want to leave the countryside and want to live in Seoul.
So the problem is getting bad.
>> CORRECT!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
132624 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-11-22 3773
132623 Being fine with becoming mama\'s boy °­*À² ¿Ï·á 2023-11-21 2
132622 homework 11.21 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-11-21 4557
132621 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-11-21 0
132620 Unit 8. Homework ¹Ú*³ª ¿Ï·á 2023-11-21 3
132619 The last time I went to the beach ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-11-21 3324
132618 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-11-21 0
132617 Do you think everyone should learn to play a musical instrument... ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-11-21 1
132616 What benefits do you think meditation brings? À±*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-11-21 2
132615 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-21 2
132614 Career change ÀÌ*¼Ö ¿Ï·á 2023-11-21 2993
132613 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-11-21 0
132612 Does homework help kids learn? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-21 5591
132611 Are you the type of person who plans everything? ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-11-21 3566
132610 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-21 3375
132609 Homework ÀÌ*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-21 2949
132608 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about \"Is it healthy... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-11-21 1
132607 Homework ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-11-21 0
132606 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-11-21 3588
132605 Homework ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-11-21 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04