¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What kind of world do you think would be this if people never went to school?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*°æ
2023-11-23 2949

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Something from which people can learn, such as schools could mean that there is no share and progress in knowledge or technology. Without knowledge accumulated incessantly, humanity could end up living primitive lives. I can¡¯t attribute human evolution and development in knowledge only to schools, of which contribution we can¡¯t underestimate to what people have achieved so far.

If we don't have a public school system, people would have to settle for a private tutoring system, which had been cherished by the rich. This signifies that people have a pent-up desire to have their children better off than them. To recap, public education systems, such as schools will see a drastic gap in knowledge accumulation by families or countries and experience downward standardization of education.

I'd like to tell my son who doesn't like school about the virtues of schools that he has had benefits. I would make it clear to him that school is the blessing that some other people have longed for.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Steve! Keep up your consistency in completing your homework every day. Great job! In terms of grammar, your sentences are correct. I've sent revised sentences for your reference, focusing on clarity and punctuation.
Sincerely,
^^ T. Ara

Something from which people can learn, such as schools could mean that there is no share and progress in knowledge or technology. 
>>> Something from which people can learn, such as schools, could mean that there is no sharing and progress in knowledge or technology.
Without knowledge accumulated incessantly, humanity could end up living primitive lives. 
>>> CORRECT!!
I can¡¯t attribute human evolution and development in knowledge only to schools, of which contribution we can¡¯t underestimate to what people have achieved so far.
>>> CORRECT!!
OR >>> I can't attribute human evolution and the development of knowledge solely to schools, the contribution of which we cannot underestimate in what people have achieved so far.
If we don't have a public school system, people would have to settle for a private tutoring system, which had been cherished by the rich. 
>>> CORRECT!!
This signifies that people have a pent-up desire to have their children better off than them. 
>>> CORRECT!!
OR >>> This signifies that people have a pent-up desire to see their children better off than themselves.
To recap, public education systems, such as schools will see a drastic gap in knowledge accumulation by families or countries and experience downward standardization of education.
>>> CORRECT!!
I'd like to tell my son who doesn't like school about the virtues of schools that he has had benefits. 
>>> CORRECT!!
OR >>> I'd like to tell my son, who doesn't like school, about the virtues of schools from which he has benefited.
I would make it clear to him that school is the blessing that some other people have longed for.
>>> CORRECT!!
OR >>> I would make it clear to him that school is a blessing that some other people have longed for.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
138083 The best way to make the road transport of goods safer is to ask... ÀÌ*´Ã ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 2204
138082 Homework ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 1
138081 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 2013
138080 Do you think buffet restaurants are worth their price? Why or... Çö* ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 2251
138079 Household duties ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 2623
138078 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 3
138077 Homework ³ª*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 0
138076 What kind of movies do you like watching at a movie theater? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 2343
138075 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 0
138074 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 0
138073 purchases ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 0
138072 What fruit or fruits that aren\'t available in Korea would you... Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 2127
138071 What are the things you enjoy most? Write at least two and... Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 2423
138070 junk food ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 2
138069 How do you avoid arguments? ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 2397
138068 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 0
138067 What do you think is the worst toy ever created for children?... ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 2
138066 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 2266
138065 Are there many people of different cultures in your country? Are... ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 2024
138064 How does jealousy affect people? ÃÖ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04