¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2023-11-28 4941

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Hello.
How was your day?
Today was the hell for me.
I saw many patients and did a lot of aesthetic procedures, nevertheless, today's income was not good, and it made me frustrated.
At lunch time, my wife came to me and we had a delicious food.
During the lunch time, I told her that my mother is so worried about my debt, and it was my mistake.
After leaving, My wife texted me that she felt so bad.
She asked me if she should reduce all expense for living with anger this afternoon.
She seemed to misunderstand about this situation.
I shouldn't have told her about my mother.
I think that there was always bad happenings after I told her about my mother.
My mother always is worried about everythings, especially about me.
Since I am her son, I can understand her, but my wife can't.
Anyway, I worked over one hour than decided today.
I am really exhausted, but I have to make up with my wife soon.
I will drink some wiskey tonight.
I am not sure I can attend tomorrow's class.
Anyway, see you.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good evening, Dr. Kim!

Since I had some extra energy left, I decided to check and comment on your homework. Well, today was a fine one. I was a rainbow today so I bought lottery tickets. ^^ The money prize is around 3 million dollars. If I suddenly disappear, you know what happened. ^^

I am certain that you are exhausted today. Perhaps it started with our conversation this morning. Moreover, your revenue is not quite as expected. Sometimes when it rains, it really pours. This idiom inn English means that when one negative thing happens, it is a chain of unfortunate events. What is more is that your wife feels she needs to adjust to the financial condition you have right now. It became more complex and there are more people involved now like your mother.

Then, this time, you can realize the price of solitude and your own self time. As you pour on your whisky tonight, remember that some problems hardly disappear the next day but at least, this whisky can make you forget even just for a little while of the worries you have. Cheers!

As you can see, I have suggested some ways to revise some of the words  or phrases. Please go over them well. Well done on your composition today!

See you soon.

-T. Donna~

Hello.
>> Correct!

How was your day?
>> Correct!

Today was the hell for me.
>> Today was a hell for me.

I saw many patients and did a lot of aesthetic procedures, nevertheless, today's income was not good, and it made me frustrated.
>> Correct! Very good sentence!

At lunch time, my wife came to me and we had a delicious food.
>>  Correct!

During the lunch time, I told her that my mother is so worried about my debt, and it was my mistake.
>> Correct!

After leaving, My wife texted me that she felt so bad.
>> Correct!
Or: After leaving, my wife texted me that she felt so bad.

She asked me if she should reduce all expense for living with anger this afternoon.
>> She asked me if she should reduce all expenses for living with anger this afternoon.

She seemed to misunderstand about this situation.
>> Correct!
Or: She seemed to misunderstand this situation.

I shouldn't have told her about my mother.
>> Correct!

I think that there was always bad happenings after I told her about my mother.
>> I think that there is always a bad happening after I told her about my mother.

My mother always is worried about everythings, especially about me.
>> My mother is always worried about everything, especially about me.

Since I am her son, I can understand her, but my wife can't.
>> Correct!

Anyway, I worked over one hour than decided today.
>> Anyway, I worked over one hour than usual today.

I am really exhausted, but I have to make up with my wife soon.
>>  I am really exhausted, but I have to make it up with my wife soon.

I will drink some wiskey tonight.
>> Correct!
Or: whisky

I am not sure I can attend tomorrow's class.
>> I am not sure if I can attend tomorrow's class.

Anyway, see you.
>> Correct!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
131974 . ¼Û*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-10-27 3
131973 Do you think all world leaders are intelligent? Á¤*¸² ¿Ï·á 2023-10-27 4553
131972 Understanding skills and empathy ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-27 2958
131971 homework_231026 ÇÑ*·Ï ¿Ï·á 2023-10-27 2
131970 > Instead of asking Ms. Arthur to resign, what do you think the... ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-27 4014
131969 My next date ÃÖ*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-27 3425
131968 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-10-26 4213
131967 What is my favorite thing to do on social media ¹Ú*À² ¿Ï·á 2023-10-26 4327
131966 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-26 3
131965 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-26 3616
131964 homework ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-10-26 3817
131963 What\'s your best experience in your recent visit to Singapore? ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-26 5036
131962 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-26 3535
131961 Homework ÀÌ*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-26 3765
131960 What do you do with your friends? Why do you like spending time... ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-26 2
131959 If you had lots of power, what would you do with it? ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-26 2
131958 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about ¡°Are you willing... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-10-26 0
131957 What kinds of social problems does alcohol cause in your country? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-10-26 3136
131956 What do you think the punishment for drunk driving should be? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-10-26 3965
131955 Do you like looking at the star? Why? ÃÖ*ÇÑ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-26 3963

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04