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Do you think change is important?

작성자: 황*하
2023-12-06 5223

회원님의 영작문

People are afraid of changes because they don't want to be in the new environment,don't like spending their time to learn or study something for their surroundings. I don't want to move to another school when I was an elementary school student because it was queit tough for me to make new friends and adapt to the new environment. However, revolution always starts from the little changes. People who are facing the risk directly will get additional conpensation and be a successful person. There is saying "No pain, No gain". I think it shows very well that why we have to take the risk or put us in the new environment. If everybody lives in the same way, nobody will be in the successful life and our lives will be boring.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Good day, Sir Hwang!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


People are afraid of changes because they don't want to be in the new environment, don't like spending their time to learn or study something for their surroundings. 
>> CORRECT! 
OR >> People are afraid of changes because they don't want to be in a new environment, don't like spending their time to learn or study something to fit in their surroundings. 
I don't want to move to another school when I was an elementary school student because it was queit tough for me to make new friends and adapt to the new environment. 
>> I don't want to move to another school when I was an elementary school student because it was quite tough for me to make new friends and adapt to the new environment. 
However, revolution always starts from the little changes. 
>> CORRECT! 
People who are facing the risk directly will get additional conpensation and be a successful person. 
>> People who are facing the risk directly will get additional compensation and be a successful person. 
There is saying "No pain, No gain". 
>> There is a saying "No pain, No gain". 
I think it shows very well that why we have to take the risk or put us in the new environment. 
>> I think it shows very well that we have to take the risk or put us in the new environment. 
If everybody lives in the same way, nobody will be in the successful life and our lives will be boring.
>> CORRECT! 

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