¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What do you think is the worst kind of crime?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ½Å*¼·
2024-02-06 2863

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think the worst crime is a child sex offense. There are many kind of people around the world. However, some strangers rape child. And then, some people make a porno with child. Normally, people don't try thinking of it. But, only few strangers make a vibe scared. Another crime is a firearm accident only in the USA. Most people in the USA have their guns. That's why the firearm accident rate is high. They claim if you don't have own gun, you won't protect yourself. I can't understand the insistence. Of course, the states is the biggest country, the police can't control all of the areas. I believe there is an another way.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Eric!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


I think the worst crime is a child sex offense. 
>> I think the worst crime is a child and sex offense. 
There are many kind of people around the world. 
>> There are many kinds of people around the world. 
However, some strangers rape child. 
>> However, some strangers rape a child. 
OR >> >> However, some strangers rape children.
And then, some people make a porno with child. 
>> And then, some people involve children with pornography.
Normally, people don't try thinking of it. 
>> Normally, people don't try to think about it. 
But, only few strangers make a vibe scared. 
>> CORRECT!
Another crime is a firearm accident only in the USA. 
>> CORRECT!
Most people in the USA have their guns. 
>> CORRECT!
That's why the firearm accident rate is high. 
>> CORRECT!
They claim if you don't have own gun, you won't protect yourself. 
>> They claim that if you don't have your own gun, you won't be able to protect yourself. 
I can't understand the insistence. 
>> CORRECT!
Of course, the states is the biggest country, the police can't control all of the areas. 
>> CORRECT!
I believe there is an another way.
>> I believe there is another way.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
133479 Homework 12/22 ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-27 1
133478 What do you think is the most dangerous sport? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-12-27 3424
133477 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about \"Is it important... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-12-27 1
133476 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-27 0
133475 Is it better to save your allowance or spend it? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-27 2520
133474 Homework : unit 15 ¹Ú*³ª ¿Ï·á 2023-12-27 1
133473 Traditional ways of welcoming the New Year in my family. ±è*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-27 2942
133472 What can you say about your neighbor\'s standard of living? Are... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-27 2993
133471 Is celebrating Christmas important in your family? Why or why... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-27 3246
133470 Trust ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-12-27 2609
133469 >> What is the best place for a vacation in your country? Why is... ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-12-27 6
133468 Are there any specific foods or drinks you believe contribute to... ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-12-27 2801
133467 What do you think are the worst fears? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-12-27 2793
133466 I don\'t like video game! ¼­*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-12-27 2807
133465 How do you usually celebrate your birthday? À±*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-12-27 0
133464 Can you tell me about your favorite movie? À±*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-12-26 2
133463 Do you prefer the mountains or the beach? À±*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-12-26 0
133462 If you could do one thing to make the world better, what would... À±*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-12-26 1
133461 What do you think about backpacking as a way of traveling? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-12-26 4013
133460 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-12-26 2440

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04