¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*´Ô
2024-02-15 3298

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

People are satisfied with their life when they
feel successful.
If I choose my job or hobby sometimes it can be a person. I think I have to do my best.
Working hard is important regardless of success or result.
Such that life can make me happy and I won¡¯t regret to my life.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Great day, Ms. Sunny!
We all have ways to become successful, we need to work on our own to achieve our goal. Don't try using the ruler of success of the other person.
Have a good day!
Aki~

People are satisfied with their life when they feel successful.
>>> CORRECT!
OR >> Accomplishment and success make people satisfied with their lives.

If I choose my job or hobby sometimes it can be a person.
>>> Whenever I choose my job or hobby there is the influence of another person.

I think I have to do my best.
>>> CORRECT!

Working hard is important regardless of success or result.
>>> Working hard is important regardless of the result.

Such that life can make me happy and I won¡¯t regret to my life.
>>> Such life can make me happy with no regrets.


¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
136382 2024.04.12 ³²*·Ê ¿Ï·á 2024-04-15 2333
136381 How have cars improved our lives or have caused more problems... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-15 1849
136380 What do you think about putting in effort but no progress? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-15 3100
136379 Something I would risk my life ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-15 2880
136378 12.Apr.2024 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-15 1
136377 Homework ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-04-15 2
136376 What do you like about living in your neighborhood? Áø*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-14 3
136375 How are your friendships different now than they were when you... ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-14 2597
136374 What do you borrow from your friends? ¸Í*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-14 2264
136373 What do say when you want to know if a person needs help? Write... Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-04-14 2706
136372 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-04-14 2
136371 Homework À±*¼± ¿Ï·á 2024-04-14 2975
136370 HOMEWORK FOR 04.12.2024 WRITING TASK: Which chore do you like... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-04-14 5
136369 What are your thoughts on Korean fashion? Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-14 3466
136368 Describe a useful website ¿À*¼Ò ¿Ï·á 2024-04-14 1
136367 How do you take care of your teeth? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-04-13 3
136366 In Korea, there are many people who fawn on Mondays. À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2024-04-13 3166
136365 These are my favorite days :) À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2024-04-13 2759
136364 If I could have chosen any job, I wanted to be an astrophysicist. À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2024-04-13 2854
136363 Rest is very important! À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2024-04-13 3151

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04