¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework 03.20

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2024-03-20 2685

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
How does contamination affect our health?

These days, many people are worried about environmental pollution.
So, there are many campaigns and movements to reduce contamination.
One of the reason why many people want to reduce contamination is health.
For example, if living for water, ground, and food are contaminated in the area where we live, we cannot live healthy.
And as a result, our life time will be reduce.
The contamination are affect to nature and animals.
Finally, I think this effect will follow to greater disaster for people like a butterfly effect.
But, I think the bigger problem is that a few worst companies secretly spill dangerous and contamination substances into the land or sea.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
How does contamination affect our health?


These days, many people are worried about the environmental pollution.
>> CORRECT!
So, there are many campaigns and movements to reduce contamination.
>> CORRECT!
One of the reason why many people want to reduce contamination is health.
>> One of the reasons why many people want to reduce contamination is because of health concerns.
For example, if living for water, ground, and food are contaminated in the area where we live, we cannot live healthy.
>> For example, if our sources like water, ground, and food are contaminated in the area where we live, we cannot live healthily.
And as a result, our life time will be reduce.
>> And as a result, the time of our lives will be reduced.
The contamination are affect to nature and animals.
>> The contamination also affects nature and animals.
Finally, I think this effect will follow to greater disaster for people like a butterfly effect.
>> Finally, I think this effect will lead to greater disasters to people like a butterfly effect.
But, I think the bigger problem is that a few worst companies secretly spill dangerous and contamination substances into the land or sea.
>> CORRECT!

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
133942 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-16 3
133941 What is the hardest part to learn in English? Why? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-01-16 3801
133940 Spending lavishly ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-01-16 3593
133939 Homework Àå*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-16 3219
133938 How do you keep in touch with your relatives and friends? ±Ç*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-16 1
133937 About sports °í*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-16 3390
133936 homework 01.16 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2024-01-16 2899
133935 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-01-16 416
133934 What are the most common factories in your hometown? ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-16 0
133933 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-16 3083
133932 Music is language ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-01-16 0
133931 Are they real people? ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-01-16 0
133930 1/16 homework ³ë*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-16 2
133929 Happy Tuesday! do*eun ¿Ï·á 2024-01-16 2307
133928 Do you like playing in the playground when it is raining? ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-01-16 2232
133927 Is this homework? °­*¸² ¿Ï·á 2024-01-16 2
133926 What\'s your favorite thing about your home? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-01-16 2440
133925 Homework °­*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-16 1889
133924 What do you think of being a vegetarian? Some people give up... Ȳ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-01-16 2538
133923 Homework À±*¼± ¿Ï·á 2024-01-16 2462

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04