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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

HW

작성자: 나*진
2024-03-27 1868

회원님의 영작문

Due to words limit, I will just put an answer of Q1, and tell the other parts in the class!

I believe I would like to work with your company because it has a stable track record of performance and shows potential for future growth. Neople has maintained stable revenue over a long period through Dungeon & Fighter, establishing itself as a key driver of Nexon's overall revenue. Building on this stability, Neople has successfully launched Dungeon & Fighter Mobile using the same IP, demonstrating the experience and expertise to make future projects successful. Furthermore, the release of console and PC games targeting untapped markets like North America and Europe, rather than the saturated mobile market, showcases Neople's business expansion capabilities. I hope to contribute my experience and skills to drive results and find fulfillment in the company, thus enabling both myself and the company to grow together.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Your response effectively demonstrates a deep understanding of Neople's successful track record in the gaming industry, hence, showing your keen interest in contributing to the company's growth by emphasizing your desire to leverage your experience and skills to drive results. This aligns well with Neople's business expansion goals and expresses your proactive approach to mutual growth and success within the company. Well done on providing a detailed and thoughtful answer!
~ Teacher Maxine

I believe I would like to work with your company because it has a stable track record of performance and shows potential for future growth. 
>> CORRECT!
OR >> I believe that I would like to work with your company due to its consistent track record of performance and its potential for future growth.

Neople has maintained stable revenue over a long period through Dungeon & Fighter, establishing itself as a key driver of Nexon's overall revenue. 
>> CORRECT!
OR >> Neople has maintained a stable revenue stream over an extended period through Dungeon & Fighter, establishing itself as a crucial driver of Nexon's overall revenue.

Building on this stability, Neople has successfully launched Dungeon & Fighter Mobile using the same IP, demonstrating the experience and expertise to make future projects successful. 
>> CORRECT!
OR >> Expanding on this stability, Neople has successfully launched Dungeon & Fighter Mobile using the same IP, showcasing their experience and expertise in ensuring the success of future projects.

Furthermore, the release of console and PC games targeting untapped markets like North America and Europe, rather than the saturated mobile market, showcases Neople's business expansion capabilities. 
>> CORRECT!
OR >> Moreover, the company's release of console and PC games targeting untapped markets like North America and Europe, rather than the saturated mobile market, highlights Neople's capacity for business expansion.

I hope to contribute my experience and skills to drive results and find fulfillment in the company, thus enabling both myself and the company to grow together.
>> CORRECT!
OR >> I aim to contribute my experience and skills to drive positive results and find personal fulfillment within the company, thus fostering mutual growth for both myself and the company.

번호 제목 글쓴이 공개 상태 등록일 조회수
135020 Who pays 양*연 완료 2024-02-27 1662
135019 Can you tell me a little bit about the history of your hometown? 오*소 완료 2024-02-27 3
135018 How good are you at playing sports? How could you be better? 최*정 완료 2024-02-26 1934
135017 homework 유*린 완료 2024-02-26 2139
135016 homework 유*린 완료 2024-02-26 2075
135015 Traveling to new places open people\'s minds to new ideas. 이*윤 완료 2024-02-26 3098
135014 Discuss the importance of kindness in daily life. 김*순 완료 2024-02-26 1829
135013 Homework 장*혁 완료 2024-02-26 2950
135012 homework 김*연 완료 2024-02-26 1721
135011 Good and bad things about me 이*규 완료 2024-02-26 3020
135010 Homework 이*준 완료 2024-02-26 3918
135009 homework 김*린 완료 2024-02-26 0
135008 Homework 김*서 완료 2024-02-26 2
135007 homework 02.26 최*� 완료 2024-02-26 3048
135006 Homework 김*우 완료 2024-02-26 6
135005 Do you prefer to travel alone or with others? Why? 박*은 완료 2024-02-26 2573
135004 How important do you think to greet someone properly? 박*은 완료 2024-02-26 3149
135003 Are you afraid of heights? 송*우 완료 2024-02-26 3531
135002 I think it\'s better to use words rather than slang 윤*혜 완료 2024-02-26 3646
135001 whice one 민*정 완료 2024-02-26 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[마이페이지 > 수업 내용 보기 > 학습 캘린더 > 영작교정 버튼 클릭]

수업 횟수만큼 영작교정 게시판이 생성되며,
지난 날짜에도 게시 할 수 있습니다.

주5회 수업 : 월 20회 이용 가능
주3회 수업 : 월 12회 이용 가능
주2회 수업 : 월 08회 이용 가능
01
교정 내용은 최대 1,000byte까지 올릴 수 있습니다.

첨부 파일은 원활한 첨삭을 위한 참고자료로 사용될 뿐,
파일에 대한 첨삭은 불가능 합니다.

업로드 가능한 첨부 파일은 최대 2mb까지이며,
첨부 할 수 있는 파일 형식은 다음과 같습니다.

문서 - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
이미지 - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
하루 게시 가능한 글은 3회까지 이며,
종료된 수업의 영작교정 게시판은
이용이 어려운 점 양해 부탁 드립니다.
04

와이즈에듀케이션아이(주) 사이트명: 파워잉글리쉬 대표이사 전상현
사업자등록번호: 217-81-44736 통신판매신고번호: 2014-서울도봉-0233호
서울본사: 서울시 노원구 한글비석로 245 두타빌 B동 7층 713호
대표번호 1688-8672 개인정보관리 책임자: 안희영 [powerenglish@pweng.net]