¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: À±*¼±
2024-03-28 2119

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

One of the most common ways to lose weight is to reduce the amount of food you eat. However, excessive dietary restrictions can cause harm to your health. Another common way to lose weight is by exercising. However, when overdone, it can also have an adverse effect on our bodies and minds. One of the most common mistakes of dieting is by eating insufficient nutrients. Our bodies need various nutrients, and a lack of these essential nutrients can put our health at risk.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Mia! Thank you for writing your homework. Indeed, we need to ensure that we are getting the essential nutrients every day, even when we are on a diet. Well done! 
-Khai

One of the most common ways to lose weight is to reduce the amount of food you eat. 

>> CORRECT

OR

>> Reducing the amount of food you eat is one of the most common ways to lose weight.

However, excessive dietary restrictions can cause harm to your health. 

>> CORRECT

Another common way to lose weight is by exercising. 

>> CORRECT
OR

>> In addition, exercising is a common way to lose weight.

However, when overdone, it can also have an adverse effect on our bodies and minds. 

>> CORRECT

OR

>> But when it is overdone, it can have a negative effect on our bodies and minds.

One of the most common mistakes of dieting is by eating insufficient nutrients. 

>> One of the most common mistakes in dieting is eating insufficient nutrients.

Our bodies need various nutrients, and a lack of these essential nutrients can put our health at risk.

>> CORRECT

OR

>> Our bodies need various vitamins and minerals, and a lack of these can put our health at risk.


¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
135223 HOMEWORK FOR 03.05.2024 WRITING TASK: How can one maintain a... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-03-05 4
135222 Who among the 4 people in the examples of pessimists and... ¼Û*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-03-05 1
135221 homework ÀÌ*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2024-03-05 2746
135220 Unconditional help ÀÓ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-03-05 1983
135219 Is it better to be an optimist or a pessimist? State your... ¼Û*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-03-05 2
135218 homework ÀÌ*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-05 2591
135217 The worst wedding ceremony I\'ve seen ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-05 2483
135216 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-03-05 2950
135215 Homework ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-03-05 2
135214 What is your job? ¿À*¼Ò ¿Ï·á 2024-03-05 2
135213 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 1
135212 homework À¯*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 2542
135211 Do you think the Korean education system is perfect for society? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 2543
135210 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 0
135209 Homework Àå*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 2104
135208 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 0
135207 A dependable person ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 2333
135206 Question about \\\'Compared to\\\' Á¤*¼· ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 3443
135205 Page.11 ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 3
135204 Was I rude in the subway? ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 2900

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04