¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think you\'re a naturally hard-working person? Why or why not?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*Àº
2024-03-29 2110

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think I'm naturally hard-working person. I resembled my father. He is perfectionist and really good at self-control.
But I guess I have been affected by environment too. When I was young, my dad got upset easily. He scolded me and my brother hard even for small things. For example, when we put down chopsticks loudly or roll the dices to the wrong place when we play board games, he got angry. I think that may affected me to become a perfectionist. But now my dad hardly gets upset and I'm not a perfectionist anymore, which shows the fact that environment has also affected to my personality.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Seong Eun,

First, I want to take a few moments to commend you for your hard work on your homework. One can tell that you genuinely put thought into how to express yourself. The part of your own personality traits and the power of your environment are fantastic. I appreciate how you delve into the behavior of your father and how you relate to him. Understanding oneself is a crucial step toward personal growth, and it's clear that you're well on your way to self-awareness and self-transformation. Continue to delve into and learn about yourself - it's a journey that never truly ends. Your dedication to this process is commendable. Keep up the excellent work!

~Teacher Cathy

 

I think I'm naturally hard-working person.

>>I think I'm a naturally hard-working person.

I resembled my father.

>>CORRECT

OR>>I was like my father.

He is perfectionist and really good at self-control.

>>He is a perfectionist and really good at self-control.

But I guess I have been affected by environment too.

>>But I guess I have been affected by the environment too.

When I was young, my dad got upset easily.

>>CORRECT

OR>>When I was a child, my father got angry quickly.

He scolded me and my brother hard even for small things.

>>CORRECT

OR>>He scolded my brother and I a lot, even over petty things.

For example, when we put down chopsticks loudly or roll the dices to the wrong place when we play board games, he got angry.

>>For example, when we put down chopsticks loudly or roll the dice to the wrong place when we played board games, he got angry.

I think that may affected me to become a perfectionist.

>>CORRECT

OR>>I believe that might have made me a perfectionist.

But now my dad hardly gets upset and I'm not a perfectionist anymore, which shows the fact that environment has also affected to my personality.

>>But now my dad hardly gets upset and I'm not a perfectionist anymore, which shows the fact that the environment has also affected my personality.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
136050 HOMEWORK ±è*Á¦ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-02 2613
136049 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-02 2093
136048 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about \"What is the... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2024-04-02 0
136047 cheer up ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-02 2
136046 What do you enjoy most about school and why? ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-04-02 2
136045 What do you do in the minutes before you sleep? Does it help you... ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-04-02 2086
136044 Homework ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-04-02 3
136043 What have you lost while traveling? ¹Ú*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-04-02 2710
136042 Homework À±*¼± ¿Ï·á 2024-04-02 2723
136041 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-04-02 2966
136040 Homework ¹Ú*Çý ¿Ï·á 2024-04-02 2226
136039 WRITING TASK: What can you do for people who have sleeping... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-04-02 7
136038 What advice would you give someone considering getting a pet for... ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-04-02 4
136037 What do you think about taking a nap? How about sleeping in? ¿À*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-04-02 3182
136036 What are your thoughts on the safety issues in your city? ¼­*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-02 5441
136035 homework ÀÌ*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2024-04-02 2608
136034 Vocabulary ÀÓ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-04-02 4055
136033 HW ³ª*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-04-02 2653
136032 Which skills do you think you need to be an excellent table... ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-02 2539
136031 Best piece of advice ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-02 2597

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04