¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

HW

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ³ª*Áø
2024-04-30 2445

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Two factors continually drive me to hustle within the industry: passion for gaming and results. Firstly, being a gamer at heart, I inherently enjoy playing games, which makes working in the gaming industry fulfilling. This passion sustains me through challenging times. For instance, my consistent involvement in content production activities ensures my perseverance. Secondly, the results of my hard work serve as motivation. Successes like securing significant contracts or improving processes in my current role fuel my desire to achieve further. As someone who constantly seeks growth, I channel this passion into areas I care about deeply.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Eugene! 
You used effective expressions and organization to showcase your ideas in this response while maintaining a professional tone.
Great job!
~ Teacher Maxine

Two factors continually drive me to hustle within the industry: passion for gaming and results. 
>> CORRECT

Firstly, being a gamer at heart, I inherently enjoy playing games, which makes working in the gaming industry fulfilling. 
>> CORRECT

This passion sustains me through challenging times. 
>> CORRECT

For instance, my consistent involvement in content production activities ensures my perseverance. 
>> CORRECT
OR >> For example, my unwavering commitment to content production activities reflects this dedication.

Secondly, the results of my hard work serve as motivation. 
>> CORRECT
OR >> Secondly, the tangible outcomes of my hard work serve as a powerful source of motivation.

Successes like securing significant contracts or improving processes in my current role fuel my desire to achieve further. 
>> CORRECT

As someone who constantly seeks growth, I channel this passion into areas I care about deeply.
>> CORRECT
OR >> As someone who is constantly seeking personal and professional growth, I channel this passion into meaningful contributions within the areas I deeply care about.



¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
136290 homework À¯*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-04-10 2389
136289 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-10 2941
136288 Homework Àå*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-10 2068
136287 I want to know these sentences are grammatically correct! °­*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-10 2133
136286 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-04-10 2
136285 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-10 2529
136284 What is the most common way of inviting someone formally in your... ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-10 3168
136283 About my best friend ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-10 2081
136282 homework ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-04-10 2364
136281 homework ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-04-10 2755
136280 Describe your dream wardrobe ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-10 0
136279 Homework ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-04-10 1
136278 Aside from mermaids, what other mythical creatures do you know? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-04-10 2105
136277 Is Father¡¯s Day celebrated in your country? Why is such a day... ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-10 2040
136276 2024.04.09 ³²*·Ê ¿Ï·á 2024-04-10 2276
136275 HOMEWORK: Name anything you would like to improve about yourself. ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-04-10 2539
136274 HOMEWORK: Why do people need to learn English as a second... ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-04-10 1848
136273 Name anything you would like to improve about yourself. ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-04-10 2270
136272 What is the worst restaurant you have eaten at? À±*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-04-10 2
136271 What ride do you want to try next? ÃÖ*ÇÑ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-10 2331

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04