¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework 05.21

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2024-05-21 3421

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
What do you think are the reasons why people hoard?

I think the reason why some people are hoarding is to make money easily.
I think why the hoarding happen is simple.
This is because of supply and demand.
So hoarding is one of the social problems that since a long time.
People who are hoarding can easily make a lot of money through hoarding.
But these days, many people are more angry compare to a few years ago about hoarding.
This is because they sell a ridiculous price.
Examples, there are idol concert tickets, limited goods, and more.
They even use the macro applications.
And we can't win the computer applications with human hands.
So many companies try to prevent this kinds of bad people.
However, it's not easy to stop their acting.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
What do you think are the reasons why people hoard?


I think the reason why some people are hoarding is to make money easily.
>> CORRECT!
I think why hoarding happen is simple.
>> I think the reason why the hoarding happens is simple.
This is because of supply and demand.
>> CORRECT!
So hoarding is one of the social problems that since a long time.
>> So hoarding is one of the social problems ever since.
People who are hoarding can easily make a lot of money through hoarding.
>> CORRECT!
OR >> Hoarders can easily make a lot of money through hoarding.
But these days, many people are more angry compare to a few years ago about hoarding.
>> But these days, many people are angrier compared to a few years ago about hoarding.
This is because they sell a ridiculous price.
>> This is because they sell items in a ridiculous price.
Examples, there are idol concert tickets, limited goods, and more.
>> CORRECT!
They even use the macro applications.
>> CORRECT!
And we can't win the computer applications with human hands.
>> CORRECT!
So many companies try to prevent this kinds of bad people.
>> So many companies try to prevent these kinds of bad people.
However, it's not easy to stop their acting.
>> However, it's not easy to stop the way they act.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
141652 Do you think convenience stores should offer healthier food... ÀÓ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-12-24 1560
141651 Ãß°¡ ¹®Á¦ ±è*Çý ¿Ï·á 2024-12-24 1892
141650 Homework & Question ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-24 1925
141649 Homework ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-24 0
141648 What is included in your \"Bucket List\" ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-24 1641
141647 What might happen if you don¡¯t use any phones in a day, week,... ÇÑ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-23 1601
141646 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-12-23 1
141645 What do you like most about your room? Why? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-12-23 2024
141644 Why don¡¯t governments ban smoking if it causes so many health... ¼Û*ÀÚ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-23 2
141643 Home work ½Å*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2024-12-23 1708
141642 Homework ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-23 1675
141641 How can we educate others about environmental issues? ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-23 1329
141640 Have you ever suffered from insomnia? If so, how severe was it,... ¼Û*ÀÚ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-23 2
141639 [Writing Exercise] Kindly explain the quotation in 3 to 5... ¼Û*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-23 0
141638 John Shirley said: \"Weekends are a bit like rainbows; they look... ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-23 1
141637 Homework : The Best Way to Manage Time Efficiently ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-23 1705
141636 what do you do when go on a trip? ¾î*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-23 2
141635 How often do you visit a convenience store? What is your... ÀÓ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-12-23 1702
141634 Misic ¾î*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-23 2
141633 20Dec2024 homework ±è*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2024-12-23 1673

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04