¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework 05.21

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2024-05-21 3594

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
What do you think are the reasons why people hoard?

I think the reason why some people are hoarding is to make money easily.
I think why the hoarding happen is simple.
This is because of supply and demand.
So hoarding is one of the social problems that since a long time.
People who are hoarding can easily make a lot of money through hoarding.
But these days, many people are more angry compare to a few years ago about hoarding.
This is because they sell a ridiculous price.
Examples, there are idol concert tickets, limited goods, and more.
They even use the macro applications.
And we can't win the computer applications with human hands.
So many companies try to prevent this kinds of bad people.
However, it's not easy to stop their acting.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
What do you think are the reasons why people hoard?


I think the reason why some people are hoarding is to make money easily.
>> CORRECT!
I think why hoarding happen is simple.
>> I think the reason why the hoarding happens is simple.
This is because of supply and demand.
>> CORRECT!
So hoarding is one of the social problems that since a long time.
>> So hoarding is one of the social problems ever since.
People who are hoarding can easily make a lot of money through hoarding.
>> CORRECT!
OR >> Hoarders can easily make a lot of money through hoarding.
But these days, many people are more angry compare to a few years ago about hoarding.
>> But these days, many people are angrier compared to a few years ago about hoarding.
This is because they sell a ridiculous price.
>> This is because they sell items in a ridiculous price.
Examples, there are idol concert tickets, limited goods, and more.
>> CORRECT!
They even use the macro applications.
>> CORRECT!
And we can't win the computer applications with human hands.
>> CORRECT!
So many companies try to prevent this kinds of bad people.
>> So many companies try to prevent these kinds of bad people.
However, it's not easy to stop their acting.
>> However, it's not easy to stop the way they act.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
137994 homework ÀÌ*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2024-06-21 1951
137993 HOMEWORK ÁÖ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-06-21 2699
137992 If I could celebrate my birthday the way I wanted ÇÑ*ÀÚ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-21 2032
137991 Homework Àå*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-21 1
137990 Do you enjoy meeting new people? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-21 2332
137989 Have you ever had a bad experience with ice cream? ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-21 2811
137988 Could you live without your smartphone (or other technology... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-21 2005
137987 HOMEWORK Á¤*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-21 2085
137986 2024.06.21 ¼÷Á¦ ¾ç*À² ¿Ï·á 2024-06-21 3
137985 double-edged sword ÀÓ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-21 2453
137984 Homework ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-21 0
137983 hacker ÀÓ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-20 2123
137982 Could you live without your smartphone (or other technology... Çö* ¿Ï·á 2024-06-20 2082
137981 In which area would you prefer to live, rural or urban? ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-20 2125
137980 Make sentences using the words below: Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-06-20 1907
137979 What type of information should you put on social networking... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-20 3205
137978 What do you want to do when the weather is too hot. Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-20 2742
137977 Crime ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-06-20 2285
137976 What is your motto? Á¤*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-20 2690
137975 What do you think is the most popular toy in the world? Explain. ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-20 3

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04