¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework 05.30

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2024-05-30 2179

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
How important is tourism to your country?

In my opinion, it depends on the different rate generation, but many people like the tourism.
There are many reasons why people like to travel.
Among the reason, as we know, South Korea is a small country.
So many Korean people often go on a day trips if they have a enough time.
But on the downside, we think domestic travel don't have special point.
Honestly, I can't recommend tourist spot except for Seoul and Busan in South Korea.
This means everywhere we go, we can do the same activity programs , experience and food.
Similar reasons, there are many people feel sick of domestic travel.
This is because, many tour locations's staff provide the ridiculous prices and unkind attitudes to tourist.
I feel so ashamed, but sometimes I seen through the news a lot of cases of rip-off situation to foreign tourists.
That's why many Korean people go on an overseas trip instead of a domestic trip.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
How important is tourism to your country?


In my opinion, it depends on the different rate generation, but many people like the tourism.
>> In my opinion, it depends on the different rates of each generation, but many people like tourism.
There are many reasons why people like to travel.
>> CORRECT!
Among the reasons, as we know, South Korea is a small country.
>> CORRECT!
So many Korean people often go on a day trips if they have a enough time.
>> So many Korean people often go on day trips if they have enough time.
But on the downside, we think domestic travel don't have special point.
>> But on the downside, we think domestic travels don't have a special point.
Honestly, I can't recommend tourist spot except for Seoul and Busan in South Korea.
>> Honestly, I can't recommend any tourist spots except for Seoul and Busan in South Korea.
This means everywhere we go, we can do the same activity programs , experience and food.
>> This means everywhere we go, we can do the same activities, experiences, and food.
Similar reasons, there are many people feel sick of domestic travel.
>> Similar reasons, there are many people who feel sick of domestic travels.
This is because, many tour locations's staff provide the ridiculous prices and unkind attitudes to tourist.
>> This is because many tour staff provide ridiculous prices and unkind behavior to tourists.
I feel so ashamed, but sometimes I seen through the news a lot of cases of rip-off situation to foreign tourists.
>> I feel so ashamed, but sometimes I see through the news a lot of rip-off cases to foreign tourists.
That's why many Korean people go on an overseas trip instead of a domestic trip.
>> CORRECT!

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
137594 Are there any plants that people think bring bad luck in your... ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-04 2554
137593 Writing task: Use the following words in sentences: 1. suggested... Ȳ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-06-04 2424
137592 The most valuable lesson from past challenges ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-04 1855
137591 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-06-04 1930
137590 How do we stop the idea that people with disabilities should be... ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-06-04 2046
137589 Homework Àå*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-03 2235
137588 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-06-03 2
137587 WiBro ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-06-03 2011
137586 What is traditional food in your country? ±è*±â ¿Ï·á 2024-06-03 1874
137585 Waiting does not know end ÀÓ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-03 3103
137584 homework 06.03 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2024-06-03 1216
137583 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-03 0
137582 Hobby ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-06-03 1673
137581 What is your favorite snack? ÃÖ*¼º ¿Ï·á 2024-06-03 3006
137580 2024.06.03 ¼÷Á¦ ¾ç*À² ¿Ï·á 2024-06-03 0
137579 homework ±è*º° ¿Ï·á 2024-06-03 1
137578 Question suggestions ³ª*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-06-03 1962
137577 Mar 31th\'s homework ¾È*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-03 2239
137576 hw ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-06-03 1
137575 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-06-03 1632

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04