¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ½É*Áø
2024-07-06 2294

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

my apartment is location around factory.
so there are many inconvenient things to live. for example i have to endure noisy and bad air .
The biggest drawback is that there are no good facilities around.
If we want to hang out with our friends, we walk to the city a lot
I have to go to the city called Daegu, which is close to me.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good evening, Mi Jin!

I'm sending you back your corrected essay. Thank you for sending it. Please go through the correction provided. Speak to you next class! Have a good one! 


Cheers,
Jean~~




                                 


                           Please tell me about the place where you live. Describe your house. Where is it located? Describe it in as much detail as possible.



my apartment is location around factory. so there are many inconvenient things to live. for example i have to endure noisy and bad air .
>> My apartment is located in a factory area so there are many inconveniences, for example, I have to endure the noise and bad air quality.

The biggest drawback is that there are no good facilities around.
>> CORRECT~~

If we want to hang out with our friends, we walk to the city a lot
>> If we want to hang out with our friends, we have to endure a long-distance walk to the city. 

I have to go to the city called Daegu, which is close to me.
>> I have to go to the city called Daegu, which is close to our district.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
138209 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-01 2
138208 What are the advantages and disadvantages of living in the... ½Å*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-07-01 2272
138207 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-07-01 5
138206 2024.06.28 ³²*·Ê ¿Ï·á 2024-07-01 2108
138205 Why do you think people buy pirated products? ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-01 2358
138204 What are your thoughts on piracy, such as downloading movies or... ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-01 2409
138203 In what ways are dogs helpful to humans? Explain. ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-07-01 1865
138202 How do you celebrate small successes or milestones as you... ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-07-01 1734
138201 Do you think the government should always check the prices and... ±è*±â ¿Ï·á 2024-07-01 2795
138200 June 28th homehork ¾È*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-01 1982
138199 What is the best place for a vacation in your country? Why is it... Áø*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-01 2
138198 Q) What do you think of people who always work out? ÃÖ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-01 4
138197 One thing that I want to change about our culture ÇÑ*ÀÚ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-01 7
138196 Do you agree with the saying \'The customer is always right\'?... ±è*±â ¿Ï·á 2024-07-01 2012
138195 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-01 0
138194 What are the advantages and disadvantages of living in the... Çö* ¿Ï·á 2024-07-01 2142
138193 Are all-you-can-eat restaurants better than buffet restaurants?... ±è*±â ¿Ï·á 2024-07-01 1999
138192 6/28 Homework ±Ç*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-07-01 1
138191 What is a delectable food you\'ve tasted that you cannot forget? ±è*±â ¿Ï·á 2024-07-01 2090
138190 What is the most difficult circumstance you have had to... ¿À*¼Ø ¿Ï·á 2024-07-01 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04