무료 레벨테스트 받고 강사평가 남기면 1,OOO원 쿠폰 즉시 적립!

혹시 사이트에선 찾지 못한 궁금한 점이 있으세요?
남겨주신 이메일을 통해 답변 드리겠습니다.

문의하신 내용이 문자로 발송되오니
연락처를 남겨주세요.
업무시간 월~금 오전9시~오후6시
(점심시간 낮12시~오후1시)

영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

A Recent Experience of Apology

작성자: 김*민
2024-08-26 2296

회원님의 영작문

I told you my last apology at the class. I want to tell you full story.

One day, my team members discussed how to work efficiently.
One of my colleague insisted that we need to reduce the process of work cooperating with other departments.
But others insisted that cooperation with other departments is too hard, because not all team members are cooperative with our team.
Each other's voices increased at that time, and I couldn't concentrate on my task.

So I said that "Why did you make a loud voice? I think we can work in our own way!", with temperamental voice.
Then our office became silent at that moment.

After calming myself down, I started to feel ashamed to speak temperamentally in the office.
And then I wanted to apologize to my colleague who would have felt bad in that situation.
So I apologized for hurting her feelings, and fortunately, my colleague accepted my apology.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hello there, Min!

Thank you for elaborating the story about why you apologized in your office. I believe that you have nothing to be sorry or apologize about as you were in the right thinking at the time. However, you are correct to apologize since you may have hurt a colleagues ego or feelings by shutting down her sentiments.

Sometimes, the loudest point is the calmest voice. There are so many people screaming for their points of view but people do not want to listen to them. Since we have all been civilized by education and culture, we know that there is no problem better solved by a democratic and an orderly way of dialogue especially in the professional world. I admire your calmness and leadership that moment.

Congratulations to a very clear and organized composition! As you can see, there were so many correct sentences. Continue writing to express your ideas using precise adjectives and verbs. Excellent composition!

See you in class.

-T. Donna~
 
I told you my last apology at the class. I want to tell you full story.
>> I told you my last apology in class. I want to tell you the full story.

One day, my team members discussed how to work efficiently.
>> Correct!

One of my colleague insisted that we need to reduce the process of work cooperating with other departments.
>> Correct!

But others insisted that cooperation with other departments is too hard, because not all team members are cooperative with our team.
>> Correct!

Each other's voices increased at that time, and I couldn't concentrate on my task.
>> Correct!
Or: Each other's voices were loud at that time, and I couldn't concentrate on my task.

So I said that "Why did you make a loud voice? I think we can work in our own way!", with temperamental voice.
>> So I said, "Why did you make your voice loud? I think we can work in our own way," with a temperamental voice.

Then our office became silent at that moment.
>> Correct!

After calming myself down, I started to feel ashamed to speak temperamentally in the office.
>> Correct!

And then I wanted to apologize to my colleague who would have felt bad in that situation.
>> Correct! Very good sentence!

So I apologized for hurting her feelings, and fortunately, my colleague accepted my apology.
>> Correct!
번호 제목 글쓴이 공개 상태 등록일 조회수
141439 Page.9 김*진 완료 2024-12-11 2
141438 What made you interested in doing Mixed Martial Arts? 이*준 완료 2024-12-10 1953
141437 Which is better for communication, e-mail or handwritten letters? 손*희 완료 2024-12-10 1976
141436 Home work 신*라 완료 2024-12-10 1818
141435 What do you think of men who apply makeup on their faces or use... 차*진 완료 2024-12-10 1726
141434 What are your thoughts on kids having slumber parties regularly? 차*혁 완료 2024-12-10 1479
141433 Homework 김*우 완료 2024-12-10 1
141432 Homework 김*현 완료 2024-12-10 1699
141431 Homework 김*현 완료 2024-12-10 2011
141430 06Dec2024_Homework 김*라 완료 2024-12-10 1659
141429 09Dec2024_Homework 김*라 완료 2024-12-10 1620
141428 What is your favorite comfort food and why? 이*훈 완료 2024-12-10 1684
141427 How do you feel better when you\'re sad or angry? 이*희 완료 2024-12-10 1605
141426 Job interview_self introduction 김*린 완료 2024-12-10 1721
141425 How do you make the most of your life every day? 정*영 완료 2024-12-10 5
141424 About studying 도*경 완료 2024-12-10 1786
141423 snow 민*정 완료 2024-12-10 1
141422 party 민*정 완료 2024-12-10 1
141421 HOMEWORK FOR 12.06.2024 WRITING TASK: What is your source of... 임*지 완료 2024-12-10 2
141420 Tell me how orchestra concerts influence your emotions and... 노*철 완료 2024-12-10 1875

HOW TO USE IT?

[마이페이지 > 수업 내용 보기 > 학습 캘린더 > 영작교정 버튼 클릭]

수업 횟수만큼 영작교정 게시판이 생성되며,
지난 날짜에도 게시 할 수 있습니다.

주5회 수업 : 월 20회 이용 가능
주3회 수업 : 월 12회 이용 가능
주2회 수업 : 월 08회 이용 가능
01
교정 내용은 최대 1,000byte까지 올릴 수 있습니다.

첨부 파일은 원활한 첨삭을 위한 참고자료로 사용될 뿐,
파일에 대한 첨삭은 불가능 합니다.

업로드 가능한 첨부 파일은 최대 2mb까지이며,
첨부 할 수 있는 파일 형식은 다음과 같습니다.

문서 - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
이미지 - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
하루 게시 가능한 글은 3회까지 이며,
종료된 수업의 영작교정 게시판은
이용이 어려운 점 양해 부탁 드립니다.
04

와이즈에듀케이션아이(주) 사이트명: 파워잉글리쉬 대표이사 전상현
사업자등록번호: 217-81-44736 통신판매신고번호: 2014-서울도봉-0233호
서울본사: 서울시 노원구 한글비석로 245 두타빌 B동 7층 713호
대표번호 1688-8672 개인정보관리 책임자: 안희영 [powerenglish@pweng.net]