¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

A Recent Experience of Apology

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¹Î
2024-08-26 2466

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I told you my last apology at the class. I want to tell you full story.

One day, my team members discussed how to work efficiently.
One of my colleague insisted that we need to reduce the process of work cooperating with other departments.
But others insisted that cooperation with other departments is too hard, because not all team members are cooperative with our team.
Each other's voices increased at that time, and I couldn't concentrate on my task.

So I said that "Why did you make a loud voice? I think we can work in our own way!", with temperamental voice.
Then our office became silent at that moment.

After calming myself down, I started to feel ashamed to speak temperamentally in the office.
And then I wanted to apologize to my colleague who would have felt bad in that situation.
So I apologized for hurting her feelings, and fortunately, my colleague accepted my apology.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello there, Min!

Thank you for elaborating the story about why you apologized in your office. I believe that you have nothing to be sorry or apologize about as you were in the right thinking at the time. However, you are correct to apologize since you may have hurt a colleagues ego or feelings by shutting down her sentiments.

Sometimes, the loudest point is the calmest voice. There are so many people screaming for their points of view but people do not want to listen to them. Since we have all been civilized by education and culture, we know that there is no problem better solved by a democratic and an orderly way of dialogue especially in the professional world. I admire your calmness and leadership that moment.

Congratulations to a very clear and organized composition! As you can see, there were so many correct sentences. Continue writing to express your ideas using precise adjectives and verbs. Excellent composition!

See you in class.

-T. Donna~
 
I told you my last apology at the class. I want to tell you full story.
>> I told you my last apology in class. I want to tell you the full story.

One day, my team members discussed how to work efficiently.
>> Correct!

One of my colleague insisted that we need to reduce the process of work cooperating with other departments.
>> Correct!

But others insisted that cooperation with other departments is too hard, because not all team members are cooperative with our team.
>> Correct!

Each other's voices increased at that time, and I couldn't concentrate on my task.
>> Correct!
Or: Each other's voices were loud at that time, and I couldn't concentrate on my task.

So I said that "Why did you make a loud voice? I think we can work in our own way!", with temperamental voice.
>> So I said, "Why did you make your voice loud? I think we can work in our own way," with a temperamental voice.

Then our office became silent at that moment.
>> Correct!

After calming myself down, I started to feel ashamed to speak temperamentally in the office.
>> Correct!

And then I wanted to apologize to my colleague who would have felt bad in that situation.
>> Correct! Very good sentence!

So I apologized for hurting her feelings, and fortunately, my colleague accepted my apology.
>> Correct!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
140393 deadline approach ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-14 2302
140392 homework ½É*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-10-13 0
140391 What do you like about your 1st grade teacher? Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-10-13 2577
140390 In the modern world, can a person get by with only a smartphone?... Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-13 2352
140389 homework: an intership ¹Ú*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2024-10-13 2
140388 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-10-13 4
140387 homework ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-10-13 2122
140386 11oct2024_homework ±è*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2024-10-13 3219
140385 Homework ¾È*µµ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-13 2541
140384 Home work ½Å*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2024-10-12 2687
140383 Pick one food to represent you. Why did you choose it? ¿À*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-10-12 2437
140382 my opinion about \"Dislike\" button Á¤*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-12 6
140381 personal information ways Á¤*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-12 9
140380 regret ÀÓ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-12 2349
140379 Do you enjoy visiting museums or galleries to see art pieces in... À±*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2024-10-11 0
140378 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-11 2018
140377 How do you balance rest and productivity in your daily routine? ½Å*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-10-11 2794
140376 >> What are your thoughts on YouTubers or influencers who focus... ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-10-11 2
140375 What does the concept of \"winning\" mean to you? ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-11 1
140374 Scary things ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-11 2402

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04