¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you have a hobby that you enjoy under the sun?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*Èñ
2024-08-26 3127

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I don't like to stay under the sun. If to stay under the sun, the skin to get a sunburn. When I go outside, I always apply the sunblock at the face and body, wear a hat or use a sun shade. UVrays make skin disease, also make skin wrinkle. UVrays make blemish, skin burn and skin cancer. I am afraid to stay under the sun. So l don't enjoy activity under the sun.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Eva,

Thank you for sharing your thoughts on sun exposure. It¡¯s good that you take excellent care of your health by protecting your skin from the harmful effects of UV rays. Your attention to detail, like always applying sunblock and using sun protection, shows how much you value your well-being. You¡¯ve done a great job expressing your thoughts clearly and thoughtfully. Your writing really reflects your careful and caring nature, which is wonderful to see. Keep up the great work, you¡¯re doing an amazing job!

~Teacher Cathy

 

I don't like to stay under the sun.

>>CORRECT

OR>>I don't like staying under the sun.

If to stay under the sun, the skin to get a sunburn.

>>If I stay under the sun, I'll get sunburned.

When I go outside, I always apply the sunblock at the face and body, wear a hat or use a sun shade.

>>When I go outside, I always apply sunscreen to my face and body, and I wear a hat or use a sunshade.

UVrays make skin disease, also make skin wrinkle.

>>UV rays are the cause of some skin diseases, and it also makes the skin wrinkled.

UVrays make blemish, skin burn and skin cancer. I am afraid to stay under the sun.

>>UV rays cause blemishes, sunburn, and skin cancer. I'm afraid of staying under the sun.

So l don't enjoy activity under the sun.

>>So, I don't enjoy doing activities under the sun.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
136144 Missed investments ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-05 3411
136143 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-04-05 0
136142 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-04-05 0
136141 Homework ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-04-05 1
136140 homework À¯*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-04-04 3979
136139 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-04 1
136138 What festivals do you enjoy? Áø*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-04 3
136137 Page.37 ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-04-04 2
136136 What do you usually order in your favorite restaurant? ¸Í*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-04 3030
136135 Homework Àå*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-04 3999
136134 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-04-04 1
136133 What are the questions you ask yourself before inviting someone? ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-04 2704
136132 What kind of feelings do you usually feel every day? Write about... Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-04-04 2670
136131 How are you different from your best friend? Describe your... Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-04 4098
136130 What do you think the importance of traveling is? ½Å*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-04 2
136129 Running low ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-04-04 3208
136128 Do you think it\'s important to stand up for what you believe... ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-04-04 2
136127 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-04 2717
136126 To prefer to be a leader than a follower ÃÖ*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-04 2948
136125 WRITING TASK: What are the key differences between various types... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-04-04 6

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04