¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

If there are people that you do not want to come to your country, who are they and why?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*°æ
2024-09-25 2511

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I didn¡¯t think about people who don¡¯t want to come here but who can¡¯t come here due to political situations or visa problems because even Japanese enjoy visiting Korea and vice versa. If there could be some people who don¡¯t want to come to Korea, they might be people who take Korea for enemy or competitor whether politically or economically. Many years ago, we Koreans made protest against Japan¡¯s controversial and distorted perception of history between Korea and Japan. We couldn¡¯t stand looking at Japan¡¯s intentional distortion what happened to get political benefits such as Dokdo located between two countries. Only very few Koreans visited Japan, causing economical severe damage on Japan tourism industry which live on Korean tourists during the boycott. But this was brought about by Japanese right-leaning radical politicians not by normal Japanese. I hope that kind of conflicts and victims don't happen anymore.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Yeong!
Who wouldn't like to be visited by tourists, right? Tourism also promotes the development of one's economy. However, there are factors that we (citizens) are thinking that a certain country must not go into your country for safety and security purposes. Thank you for your answers.There were just those small errors that need to me modified in your sentence. 
Have a good day!
Aki~

I didn¡¯t think about people who don¡¯t want to come here but who can¡¯t come here due to political situations or visa problems because even Japanese enjoy visiting Korea and vice versa.
>>> I didn¡¯t think about people who don¡¯t want to come here but who can¡¯t come here due to political situations or visa problems because even the Japanese enjoy visiting Korea and vice versa.

If there could be some people who don¡¯t want to come to Korea, they might be people who take Korea for enemy or competitor whether politically or economically.
>>> If some people don¡¯t want to come to Korea, they might be people who take Korea as an enemy or competitor whether politically or economically.

Many years ago, we Koreans made protest against Japan¡¯s controversial and distorted perception of history between Korea and Japan.
>>> Many years ago, we Koreans protested against Japan¡¯s controversial and distorted perception of history between Korea and Japan.

We couldn¡¯t stand looking at Japan¡¯s intentional distortion what happened to get political benefits such as Dokdo located between two countries.
>>>  We couldn¡¯t stand looking at Japan¡¯s intentional distortion of what happened to get political benefits such as Dokdo located between two countries.

Only very few Koreans visited Japan, causing economical severe damage on Japan tourism industry which live on Korean tourists during the boycott
>>>  Only very few Koreans visited Japan, causing severe economic damage to Japan's tourism industry which lived on Korean tourists during the boycott.

 But this was brought about by Japanese right-leaning radical politicians not by normal Japanese. I hope that kind of conflicts and victims don't happen anymore.
>>>  But this was brought about by Japanese right-leaning radical politicians, not by normal Japanese. I hope that kind of conflict and victims don't happen anymore.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
141640 Have you ever suffered from insomnia? If so, how severe was it,... ¼Û*ÀÚ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-23 2
141639 [Writing Exercise] Kindly explain the quotation in 3 to 5... ¼Û*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-23 0
141638 John Shirley said: \"Weekends are a bit like rainbows; they look... ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-23 1
141637 Homework : The Best Way to Manage Time Efficiently ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-23 1428
141636 what do you do when go on a trip? ¾î*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-23 2
141635 How often do you visit a convenience store? What is your... ÀÓ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-12-23 1469
141634 Misic ¾î*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-23 2
141633 20Dec2024 homework ±è*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2024-12-23 1485
141632 Today, I have to absent teacher~! ±è*³ª ¿Ï·á 2024-12-23 2
141631 20.Dec.2024 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-23 0
141630 We neet time do nothing. ÀÌ*Çü ¿Ï·á 2024-12-23 1471
141629 What do you usually forget at home that you have to come back... ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-23 1663
141628 What do you do if you upset someone? ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-23 1518
141627 Please change difficult words to easy words and correct them so... ÀÌ*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-22 1464
141626 Please change difficult words to easy words and correct them so... ÀÌ*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-22 1714
141625 Please change difficult words to easy words and correct them so... ÀÌ*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-22 1386
141624 Where do you think is the best place to be? ¼­*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-12-22 1
141623 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-12-22 1
141622 HOMEWORK FOR 12.20.2024 WRITING TASK: What do you always... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-12-22 3
141621 What are your thoughts on space tourism? Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-22 1529

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04