¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*´Ô
2024-10-23 1850

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think medical insurance system is wrong in my country.
Include in private insurances can cover the all of medical bills.
Some doctor suggest methods like hospitalization to ask for all of fee of it.
If people are sick It is easy for them to go hospital by free .
We only have to pay for plastic surgery bills.
Many people don't cut down the money for their beauty
Although the prices is high.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Ms. Sunny!
I'm getting more impressed with you for making long sentences now. Aren't you proud of yourself?
Well, thank you for trying to express your thoughts well, and try to observe those tiny corrections that I made to make your sentences correct. Great job!
Aki~



I think medical insurance system is wrong in my country.
>>> I think the medical insurance system is wrong in my country.

Include in private insurances can cover the all of medical bills.
>>> Including private insurance can cover the all of medical bills.

Some doctor suggest methods like hospitalization to ask for all of fee of it.
>>> Some doctors suggest methods like hospitalization to ask for all of the fees of it.

If people are sick It is easy for them to go hospital by free .
>>> If people are sick It is easy for them to go hospital for free

We only have to pay for plastic surgery bills.
>> CORRECT!

Many people don't cut down the money for their beauty.
>> CORRECT!

Although the prices is high.
>>> Although the prices are high.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
141014 Homework ¿À*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-11-16 1759
141013 WRITING TASK ¼­*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-11-16 1
141012 HOOMEWORK ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-16 1768
141011 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-15 2285
141010 What does \"don\'t judge a book by its cover\" mean? Do you... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-15 2395
141009 What would you say if you could talk to your future self? ½Å*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-11-15 1632
141008 11/14(Thu) homework ±è*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-15 2428
141007 11/15(Fri) homework ±è*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-15 1632
141006 Home work for wednesday ( 13th Novemder ) ±è*¿ë ¿Ï·á 2024-11-15 1898
141005 >> Should people of all ages play games? Explain. ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-11-15 4
141004 What makes someone a good friend? ¿À*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-11-15 1631
141003 Does age make you more aware of and caring for others? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-11-15 1621
141002 What¡¯s the best way to study for exams? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-11-15 1690
141001 HOOMEWORK ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-15 1902
141000 What do you think is the most difficult job in the world and why? ÀÌ*¹ü ¿Ï·á 2024-11-15 3
140999 What¡¯s the most challenging part of your job? ÀÌ*¹ü ¿Ï·á 2024-11-15 2
140998 HOMEWORK FOR 11.15.2024 WRITING TASK: How can someone find his... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-11-15 5
140997 HOMEWORK ¾ç*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-15 2415
140996 13nov2024-homework ±è*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2024-11-15 2093
140995 Do you like collecting books? ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-15 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04