¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Oct 25th homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¾È*Èñ
2024-10-30 1812

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I stayed four days in Paris with my friend. There are many attractions looks interesting. Most of the rides are based on their movie theme. My friends and I love not only Disney, but also Marvel movies. For us, all the places were romantic and surprising. At the end of closing time, Mickey mouse said good bye. That was so cute.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Yeon Hee,

Thanks for sharing your experience. You must have really enjoyed it. =)

I stayed four days in Paris with my friend.
>> I stayed for four days in Paris with my friend.

 There are many attractions looks interesting.
>> There were many interesting attractions.

 Most of the rides are based on their movie theme.
>> Most of the rides were based on a movie theme. 

 My friends and I love not only Disney, but also Marvel movies. 
>> My friend and I love not only Disney, but also Marvel movies. 

For us, all the places were romantic and surprising. 
>> For us, we thought all the places looked romantic and amazing.

At the end of closing time, Mickey mouse said good bye. 
>> At the closing time, Mickey Mouse said "goodbye".

That was so cute.
>>CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
140597 What is the importance of family? ÃÖ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-24 0
140596 About my son ±¸*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-24 2
140595 What tourist place in your country have you not visited but... ÀÌ*¹ü ¿Ï·á 2024-10-24 7
140594 Do you have any family heirlooms or items passed down through... ÀÓ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-10-24 1619
140593 23.Oct.2024 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-24 1
140592 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-23 1687
140591 Have you ever had to step in and help during a difficult time... ½Å*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-10-23 1866
140590 Why is it important to follow guidelines and principles? ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-23 1
140589 Home work ½Å*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2024-10-23 1655
140588 When was the last time you felt proud of yourself? ¿À*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-10-23 1760
140587 >> Do you think all celebrities are talented? Explain your... ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-10-23 0
140586 homework ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-10-23 1758
140585 Homework Àå*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-23 1470
140584 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-10-23 2
140583 What do you think makes a place feel like home? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-10-23 1721
140582 How would the world change if you could instantly understand any... ±è*¼ø ¿Ï·á 2024-10-23 1728
140581 Does obtaining an award at school matter? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-10-23 2234
140580 homeless ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-23 4
140579 bedroom ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-23 1
140578 separate ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-23 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04