¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

My homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*µµ
2024-11-19 2059

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

ESSAY: Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Much of a country's development is its economic development. Presidents put great efforts into developing a country's economy, and sometimes they fail to develop it, leading to a tragic end.
However, economic development is not all about national development. Other types of development are also important developments.
For example, there is environmental development. If you only care about economic development, you should also think about the development of the environment because it destroys the environment a lot.
However, I think that a state is a union of people, and its purpose is to live well in abundance. So, I think economic development is more important than anything else.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there Lee! It's been a long time since I last checked your essay! I was surprised to check your essays in a row. Thank you! Keep it up! 
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
Much of a country's development is its economic development.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
 Presidents put great efforts into developing a country's economy, and sometimes they fail to develop it, leading to a tragic end.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
However, economic development is not all about national development.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
 Other types of development are also important developments.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
>>>  Other types of development are also important.
For example, there is an environmental development.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
 If you only care about economic development, you should also think about the development of the environment because it destroys the environment a lot.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
However, I think that a state is a union of people, and its purpose is to live well in abundance. 
>>> CORRECT~!^^
So, I think economic development is more important than anything else.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
140030 New features ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-09-24 2977
140029 Is it important to study about the outer space? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-09-24 2615
140028 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-09-24 2326
140027 Write about a memorable holiday experience. ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-24 2334
140026 Which is the greater decision-making tool: your heart or your... ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-24 2492
140025 How does laziness impact the achievement of personal or... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-24 2270
140024 Do you believe opportunities are created or discovered? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-24 2257
140023 Decisions made under pressure are often poor decisions.\' Do you... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-24 2074
140022 What¡¯s the best hobby anyone could have? ±è*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-09-24 2613
140021 Homework ³ë*ö ¿Ï·á 2024-09-24 2255
140020 Would you care to reveal your ultimate dream vacation... ÀÓ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-09-24 2778
140019 How much time do you usually spend on your hobbies? ÀÌ*¹ü ¿Ï·á 2024-09-24 4
140018 How do you feel when you say \"yes\" to something you don\'t... À±*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2024-09-24 0
140017 Well-paid and high revered profession ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-23 2858
140016 How does proper rest impact productivity and focus? ½Å*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-09-23 2074
140015 The phone number ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-09-23 2667
140014 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-23 2226
140013 What do you think is the easiest thing about learning English? ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-09-23 2844
140012 homework ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-09-23 2996
140011 homework ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-09-23 2615

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04