무료 레벨테스트 받고 강사평가 남기면 1,OOO원 쿠폰 즉시 적립!

혹시 사이트에선 찾지 못한 궁금한 점이 있으세요?
남겨주신 이메일을 통해 답변 드리겠습니다.

문의하신 내용이 문자로 발송되오니
연락처를 남겨주세요.
업무시간 월~금 오전9시~오후6시
(점심시간 낮12시~오후1시)

영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

Is academic success important in your country?

작성자: 김*경
2024-11-21 2410

회원님의 영작문

Yes, as you might have expected. Korea where the Confucianism has influenced across the board for a long time has stressed how important scholastic success is. It may be due to the genes passed down to us that places great importance on scholastic achievement, particularly getting into prestigious universities. Koreans are more likely to think getting into good college as a strong stepping stone for more success because Korea has been a society where academic and regional connections function as a powerful mechanism. That is, good educational background would lead to a good social connection with powerful alumni, which gives alumni more chances of success. Ultimately, this lead to the formation of cartel composed of alumni. Fortunately, it is not what it used to be. More people out of connections can get a chance of success through improving system of social competition and changes in people's perceptions.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hello, Mr. Steve! Undeniably, academic success is considered by most people as one of the determiners of an individual's future. Academic success can be quite important, but its significance varies depending on individual goals, values, and circumstances.
-T. Sonny
Yes, as you might have expected. 
>>Correct!
Korea where the Confucianism has influenced across the board for a long time has stressed how important scholastic success is. 
>>Korea, where Confucianism has been spread across the board for a long time, has stressed how important scholastic success is. 
It may be due to the genes passed down to us that places great importance on scholastic achievement, particularly getting into prestigious universities. 
>>It may be due to the genes that were passed down to us that place great importance on scholastic achievement, particularly getting into prestigious universities. 
Koreans are more likely to think getting into good college as a strong stepping stone for more success because Korea has been a society where academic and regional connections function as a powerful mechanism. 
>>Koreans are more likely to think of getting into a good college as a strong stepping stone to better success because Korea has been a society where academic and regional connections function as a powerful mechanism. 
That is, good educational background would lead to a good social connection with powerful alumni, which gives alumni more chances of success. 
>>From that, a good educational background would lead to a good social connection with powerful alumni, which gives more chances of success. 
Ultimately, this lead to the formation of cartel composed of alumni.
>>Ultimately, this leads to the formation of a cartel of alumni.
Fortunately, it is not what it used to be. 
>>Correct!
More people out of connections can get a chance of success through improving system of social competition and changes in people's perceptions.
>>More people out of connections can get a chance of success through improving the system of social competition and changes in people's perceptions.
번호 제목 글쓴이 공개 상태 등록일 조회수
140623 What are the advantages and disadvantages of solo travel? 이*태 완료 2024-10-25 1856
140622 Do you believe in the power of taking breaks to recharge? How do... 박*은 완료 2024-10-25 2184
140621 What are some things you look for in a new place to call home? 박*은 완료 2024-10-25 2103
140620 How does saving money impact your future plans? 박*은 완료 2024-10-25 2071
140619 How does technology shape everyday life in South Korea? 박*은 완료 2024-10-25 2147
140618 Writing task: What activities do you want to explore? Why? 김*기 완료 2024-10-25 2095
140617 Increasing the minimum wage would reduce poverty. 안*윤 완료 2024-10-25 2058
140616 When was the last time you felt proud of yourself? 구*정 완료 2024-10-25 2032
140615 Homework 노*철 완료 2024-10-25 2106
140614 homework 안*도 완료 2024-10-25 2342
140613 Homework 노*철 완료 2024-10-25 1896
140612 Konglish 양*연 완료 2024-10-25 2374
140611 Homework 김*님 완료 2024-10-25 2007
140610 Conversation with people of that country makes enrich their... 서*은 완료 2024-10-25 0
140609 homework 신*린 완료 2024-10-24 1904
140608 Home work 신*라 완료 2024-10-24 1681
140607 Some people say that humans are scarier than the most dangerous... 차*진 완료 2024-10-24 2010
140606 Homework 오*현 완료 2024-10-24 2
140605 23oct2024 homework 김*라 완료 2024-10-24 1888
140604 There is an increasing trend around the world of married couples... 박*식 완료 2024-10-24 1984

HOW TO USE IT?

[마이페이지 > 수업 내용 보기 > 학습 캘린더 > 영작교정 버튼 클릭]

수업 횟수만큼 영작교정 게시판이 생성되며,
지난 날짜에도 게시 할 수 있습니다.

주5회 수업 : 월 20회 이용 가능
주3회 수업 : 월 12회 이용 가능
주2회 수업 : 월 08회 이용 가능
01
교정 내용은 최대 1,000byte까지 올릴 수 있습니다.

첨부 파일은 원활한 첨삭을 위한 참고자료로 사용될 뿐,
파일에 대한 첨삭은 불가능 합니다.

업로드 가능한 첨부 파일은 최대 2mb까지이며,
첨부 할 수 있는 파일 형식은 다음과 같습니다.

문서 - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
이미지 - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
하루 게시 가능한 글은 3회까지 이며,
종료된 수업의 영작교정 게시판은
이용이 어려운 점 양해 부탁 드립니다.
04

와이즈에듀케이션아이(주) 사이트명: 파워잉글리쉬 대표이사 전상현
사업자등록번호: 217-81-44736 통신판매신고번호: 2014-서울도봉-0233호
서울본사: 서울시 노원구 한글비석로 245 두타빌 B동 7층 713호
대표번호 1688-8672 개인정보관리 책임자: 안희영 [powerenglish@pweng.net]