¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

It\'s a message that makes childhood is so tired.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*Çü
2024-11-26 1599

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

People talk to chilldren "If you are so hard something, you can do anything". But I think It is not good message. This is because most people are good at something and bad at something. But I don't said that somthing I was bad at, I gave up quickly.
Sometimes we have to enjoy to do something and be satisfied to our results for examples speaking forign language, playing the piano, taking a exercise and so on. We can enjoy it for longer and grow by doing it.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Thanks for doing your essay Ms. Ella! Well done! Your knowledge of the dispute and the events surrounding it shows in your essay. It is clear that you understand the main points of contention, and you have discussed these in an easily understood way. Keep it up!
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
People talk to chilldren "If you are so hard something, you can do anything".
>>> People often tell children, "If you try hard enough, you can do anything."
But I think It is not good message. 
>>> I believe it's not always the best message.
This is because most people are good at something and bad at something.
>>>The truth is, everyone is good at some things and not so good at others.
But I don't said that somthing I was bad at, I gave up quickly.
>>> But it's important to note that just because we struggle with something doesn't mean we should give up quickly.
Sometimes we have to enjoy to do something and be satisfied to our results for examples speaking forign language, playing the piano, taking a exercise and so on. 
>>> Sometimes, it's more about enjoying the process and being satisfied with our progress, rather than just aiming for perfection. For example, learning a foreign language, playing the piano, or exercising
We can enjoy it for longer and grow by doing it.
>>> We can find joy in these activities, and by doing so, we can improve and grow over time.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
141818 Is there anything that makes you learn better? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-07 1671
141817 What would you say if you could talk to your future self? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-07 1456
141816 Homework Àå*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-07 0
141815 would you relocate to another country for work? ÃÖ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-07 1892
141814 Homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-07 1529
141813 working hours ÇÑ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2025-01-07 1449
141812 How do you define success? Á¶*¸í ¿Ï·á 2025-01-07 4
141811 \"Lessons I\'ve Learned from My Favorite Movies\". ³ë*ö ¿Ï·á 2025-01-07 1931
141810 Homework & Question ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-07 1592
141809 addiction ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-07 1
141808 modern family ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-07 1
141807 Do you think dancing is a good workout? Why? Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-07 1658
141806 What are you looking forward to this 2025? Why? Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-01-07 1712
141805 Day 2 Homework ¹Ú*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-01-07 1651
141804 Homework ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-07 1
141803 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2025-01-06 1
141802 What did you do a lot when you were young, but now you barely do? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2025-01-06 1977
141801 What was your biggest accomplishment in 2024? ½Å*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2025-01-06 1926
141800 homework ½Å*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2025-01-06 1670
141799 6.Jan.2025 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-06 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04